advice for going from one kid to two.

A friend of mine who was expecting her second recently asked my advice for keeping the transition smooth when going from one kiddo to two.  Since I actually know quite a few gals who are expecting their second babies right now, I thought I'd share my thoughts here as well!

Rest.

I know there's the temptation to roll your eyes when people say 'sleep when the baby sleeps.' "Do I clean when the baby cleans, and shower when the baby showers, and cook when the baby cooks," you ask.  No, maybe not.  But those are things that you can either do when the baby is awake and in a carrier (or a bouncy seat, as is my preference, or lying safely on the couch or in a pack and play nearby, as has been Juniper's preference), or are things that don't need to happen right away.  Naps are more important than cleaning, if you're allowing them to compete in your mind.  Take a nap and then serve chicken nuggets for dinner.  Take a nap and then shower when your husband gets home.  Take a nap and let the mantel get dusty; in the long run, it's not doing any harm.  But refusing to rest can do you harm. 

As a recovering clean-freak myself, and someone who doesn't really like napping anyway, I had to start seeing rest as a discipline.  It had to stop being optional in my mind.  

Two things are going to hang you up on this point: first, the older kiddo.  If your older kiddo is not in the habit of napping, maybe they should be.  And if they really, really refuse to nap, you can still instate quiet time.  My kids, up through the age of six, spend an hour or two in their beds at the same time each afternoon.  If they sleep, great!  If they don't, oh well.  At least they're contained.  It does take training - no child likes boundaries.  So this might be something to work towards while you're still pregnant if it's not routine in your house yet.  But if you know your older kiddo will be safe in their bed, and that you will have a window of time where you can doze next to the newborn for a bit, you are much more likely to rest.

Here's a bit more about our sleep routines.

Second tripping point: thinking a nap needs to be a naaaaaaaaaap.  Some days, you may only get a 15-minute overlap where the newborn isn't wanting to nurse and the toddler is still in bed.  I have a new mantra for you, both for napping and for life: "Some is better than none."  Some sleep is better than no sleep.

And once the baby is about six weeks old, you can start gently guiding their sleep routine so that you can be on the path to getting more nighttime sleep as well.  Here is a video I did on using Babywise with gentleness, flexibility, and compassion.

Rest, 2.0.

Resting goes way beyond just sleep.  (If you can't tell, I honk the "Rest" horn pretty loud.  If there is one thing I've learned in my course of parenting, it is that there are very few things that are as crucial to family life as adequate rest for everyone.  We have suffered too much at the hands of my refusal to rest early on that I cannot, in clean conscience, shut up about resting.)

Take the first six weeks.  That's about 40 days.  Don't go to MOPS.  Don't go to Target.  Don't go to church.  (In the Old Testament, women were commanded to stay home from the general assembly for 40 days after a boy was born, and 80 after a girl.  God's okay with you missing church after having a baby.  He is protecting you.)  If you absolutely must take your tiny baby out to the pediatrician's office, I guess you absolutely must, but that pediatrician will receive a lot of muttering from me about the insanity of forcing a vulnerable mother and baby out of their nest into a den of infestation and percolation.  STAY AT HOME.  Set boundaries.  

Yes, you'll go stir crazy.  Yes, it will be hard.  But seriously.  It's only six weeks.  If you don't rest, and you end up with a preventable season of PPD (I get that it's too simplistic to say that all PPD can be prevented with adequate sleep, but I really believe many cases can be), it will take you longer than that to crawl out of the hole, so just choose to do the hard work of resting on the front end.  You're capable.  I believe in you.  Stick close to your bed, stay off your feet, rely heavily on freezer meals and meal trains and food delivery.  You need this for your amazing body to heal, and to establish breastfeeding, and to actually get some sleep.

Set the laptop up in your bed so the older kiddo can watch Thomas next to you.  Have a stack of picture books and a basket of snacks nearby so you're not constantly up and down.  Get creative.  Message me if you'd like me to help you troubleshoot.

Practical Logistics.

Park by the cart corral.  I know when you were young and single and carefree, you were told never to park by the cart corral because what if someone hits your car with a cart?  Just reconcile yourself to the fact that your car will one day get written on with gravel and always smell a little like old diapers, and rearrange your priorities.  You're a mom of many now; park right there next to the cart corral.  That way you can load the toddler into the cart right away, and either put the pumpkin seat right in as well, or put the baby in a carrier.  (This is my favorite carrier for really little babies, then at around five months I switch them to this one.)  Then, you can also haul them back that way, and put them in the car right before just popping the cart away.  That way you're not schlepping two babies through the parking lot with no help and no hands.

Keep an umbrella stroller in your car at all times.  A cheap, basic, no-frills umbrella stroller.  This thing is a godsend.  I just plunk the toddler into it when we go to doctor visits, or other public places that don't have carts.  It's mobile restraint.  When you get into the doctor's office, just leave the kiddo in there until it's time to leave, unless it's an absolute must that they come out.  (And I don't mean, "take them out if they don't like it."  They probably won't like it at first.  Again, kids don't naturally like boundaries, and again, it's a trained skill.) The baby goes in a carrier (see a trend?), the toddler goes in the stroller, and you have two hands mostly-free.

Anticipate needs.  Mealtimes will be busy; do as much as you can in advance.  Fill milk cups and prep breakfast the evening before, so that you're not dealing with a hungry toddler/preschooler and a crying newborn.  Don't plan on potty training the older one within the first four months of the baby's birth.  Have a stack of both sizes of diapers, plus wipes, plus extra clothing for each kid, next to the couch, next to your bed, in the van, in your purse, and next to the changing table.  Try to anticipate times in which you'll be needed in two places at once, and try to do as much as you can in advance to help these times go smoothly.

It's okay to make both kids wait.  Often, despite your best efforts, both kids will need something at the same time.  It's okay to tell a toddler to wait a few minutes for seconds on lunch while you nurse the baby.  It's okay to let the baby cry for five minutes in her safe bed while you finish wiping the toddler's butt.  We all have to lay down our "urgency" sometimes, including kiddos.  Don't let these times get your heart racing.  Just remind yourself that it is okay and good for them to learn to wait.

TV is okay.  Maybe you didn't know this.  It's okay if you use it to keep an older child occupied while you do something you absolutely can't do with them underfoot. Be discerning.  Surfing your phone is not a TV-is-my-babysitter kind of situation.  But showering might be.  Sleeping definitely is.  SUPERVISE, THOUGH.  Don't let your young children on YouTube or give them access to the remote.  Let them watch a Daniel Tiger DVD on the laptop in your bed while you sleep, or on the bathroom floor while you shower - do not leave the room when a child is watching TV.  Intentionally pick a show you feel comfortable with, and allow the episode length to be your boundary for how much time you have to get said thing done, and then turn it off.  Here's a helpful hint from me to you: the less TV your child watches on a typical day, the more this works.  If it's just background noise most of the time, it won't occupy them when you need it to.  So turn off the TV until you are ready to employ it as your babysitter, and then let it do its job, and then send it home.

Blanket train the older child.  I'm not sure where this came from originally, but it seems people sometimes react strongly to this idea, so I think I'm using the phrase differently than in its original context.  I'm not sure why people would freak over it, so hear me out.  Get out a crib blanket.  Put 5-7 toys and books on it.  Put the toddler on it and set a timer for 3 minutes.  If they get off, just pick them up, say no, and put them back on it.  Do it however many times you need to.  Then, when the timer goes off, give them a raisin or a chocolate chip.  Eventually, stretch the time to 5 minutes, then 7, then 10, then 15.  Eventually, stop offering a reward every time.  ANNNNNNNNNND, Blanket-Trained.

This is a huge help when you're nursing, in public or at home.  I've heard it referred to as 'a playpen in your purse' - just use a swaddle blanket, a nursing cover, or a towel whenever you need to.  (Usually, if you have a younger baby, you have one or all of these items on hand most of the time anyway.)  It gives the kiddo a visual boundary line, and keeps them from wandering away when you're unable to go after them.  It also teaches them the super valuable lesson of sitting still for a hot sec and getting absorbed in a short stretch of independent play.  Teaching them this skill is a kindness, with all kinds of applications.

And, a final word...

You will feel overwhelmed sometimes.  That's okay and normal.  Unless adding twins, there is no other point in mothering where you literally double your workload all at once, and usually your older child is still young and pretty needy, so the buck stops with you for EVVVVVVVVERYONE'S needs.  You will have to learn how to multiply (rather than divide) your attention and affection for the first time.  Getting out of the house will take eons and you won't know why.  Parenting multiple kids is a learned skill; it takes time to feel comfortable.  Have patience with yourself, and be realistic.

But there's also the flip side: this isn't your first rodeo.  Many of the most important skills are second nature to you by now.  And you will love watching your older child become a sibling - watching them love someone new, someone that you also love, is so bonding and wonderful.  If you can believe it, the new baby will make you love your older kiddo more, not rob from them (or you!)

And for further reminders and help, here is a Facebook video I did on surviving the newborn days...




...and here is a link to a YouTube video I posted on the themes I covered in today's post.

And, as always - don't hesitate to get in touch with me if you have follow-up questions, comments or concerns!  I'm typically easiest to get ahold of through The Minivan Voorsts Facebook page, or my personal page.

GENDER REVEAL!!!! (also, 'what's up weekly', but no one cares about that at this point.)

Another day, another dollar.  Another week, another 'what's up.'

Now, I know why you're likely here.  And I could do that click-baity nonsense that forces you to scroll all the way to the very end of some stupid slideshow to get to the information you're there to see, but I won't do that to you.  I'll just come right out and tell you that the baby is a...*drumroll*

…

…

…(okay, it's a little bit Clickbait Slideshow; I just couldn't resist)

A GIRL!!!!!!!!!  The pattern is broken!

We couldn't be more thrilled, though I will say we're a bit shocked.  Statistically speaking, we had a 1.5% chance of continuing the boy/girl/boy/girl pattern on, uninterrupted, for seven kids.  BUT we've also had a bunch of kids already, and not one of them had broken rank yet, so it was also a little weird to wrap our minds around!  Even Penelope, who has been saying all along that she's thought the baby is a girl, and calling her 'she', was having a hard time believing it at the ultrasound.  "I thought she was a girl, but it's weird that she really is one."  But we're all excited for the opportunity for a brand new experience: two sisters in a row!  Can you imagine tiny Callista tootling around with a an even tinier sister?!  Oh my gosh, if I think about it any longer I'm just going to melt into a puddle.  (Just add it to all the other puddles that have been absorbed into my couch cushions at this point.)

So.  There you have it.  Now that you know the baby's gender, you're free to go dink around elsewhere on the internet at this point if that's what you want to do.  I mean, if that's really what you want to do.  If that's really what you really want to do.

Oh, you're staying!  Oh goodness me.  I'm flattered!  Let me see if I can recall anything interesting from the rest of the week...

The kids and I stayed home from church on Sunday because Callista had a really, really rough night the night before.  She hasn't been sleeping well lately - she had a cough a few weeks ago, and while she's totally fine during the day, it seems like it still flares up at night.  So she was coughing and crying, and we brought her into bed with us for a while.  But she was awake at that point, so she never went to sleep, she just picked my nose and pinched my face for an hour until I'd had enough and put her back in her own bed.  But she still didn't sleep, so by Sunday morning we were kind of zombified.

Which meant Todd went to the Christmas special alone.  Which marks two years in a row I've missed it, which is significant when your church is only three Christmases old.  Oh, well.  There's always next year.

On Monday morning we had some new friends over, and we got some school wrapped up in the afternoon.  We're finishing up our last week of Term 1 (out of 3), which means we're behind schedule from all the school we missed in my early pregnancy.  But the break is hitting at a really great time, so I'm not going to worry about how the rest of the year's schedule will stretch to fit everything we have left; I'm just going to get excited that we'll be doing exams this afternoon and then taking a rest over Christmas.

Tuesday was our ultrasound, which is obviously the biggest news of the week, and then we had a members' meeting at church Tuesday evening.

Wednesday was weird.  We woke up like usual - in a mad dash to get out the door to the Amish.  We try to be up there by 9:00, which is early for us to be anywhere.  So I was having Atticus help me load the car with our milk bottles and egg cartons, and he accidentally locked the keys in the car.  So by 8:30 a.m., I'd already shelled out $50 for the tow company to come and get them out.  Then, once we were up there, I fell.  Like, major, all-out, sprawled-on-the-ground-and-covered-in-mud-and-broken-eggs fell.  It was not graceful.  I was carrying Callista and two dozen eggs.  I stepped off the sidewalk funny, and went shooting forward.  I landed janky on my shoulder as I tried to fall in such a way as to not land on Callista, and I broke a bunch of eggs.  It was so humiliating - like, I swear I've walked before.  Plus, falling while pregnant is never good, but leave it to me to fall while pregnant and carrying a toddler, and carrying EGGS, of all things.

But then I had this shooting pain all in my shoulder, and was having a hard time breathing, and my chiro told me at my appointment the next morning that I'd popped a rib head loose under my shoulder blade.  I was all kinds of messed up.  You guys.  I am just a mess.  Why are you even friends with me?

Luckily my shoulder seems to be back to good, the baby has been moving, and Callista wasn't hurt.  So it all turned out as well as it could have, minus all the eggs that got wasted.

This is how Callista falls asleep: with a paci in her mouth, and a wubbanub shoved in each ear.

The girls had eye doctor appointments yesterday, so everyone in the family has had their yearly vision check at this point - I feel like I've accomplished something major!  No more eye doctor appointments until next winter!  Now, to just find the time to go in and pick out new glasses for myself.  (And call Callista's insurance to find out why her account is inactive... ugh.  It's always something.)

And that brings us to today!  I'm now 22 weeks, and seriously craving chicken wings and, to a lesser extent, reaaally cheesy cheese pizza.  I'm still dealing with headaches, but not nearly to the extent that I had been, and I'm starting to wonder if they're diet-related.  So I'm starting to mentally prepare for some diet changes.  (Sugar-free again, and possibly dairy-free.  Yikes!  As long as I can still have cheese pizza on a dairy-free diet... Oh, is that not a thing?)  I'm also fairly confident I should stop wearing this pink shirt, as it makes me look waaay rounder than I am in reality (or at least like to believe I am.  Let me just have my dream.  I need it.).

we have an exciting announcement!

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

There is a new Van Voorst in the making, due to arrive in mid-April!  We are currently fifteen weeks along.

At the ultrasound a few weeks ago, this little nugget was shaped kind of like a big toe with arms and legs, and we could NOT BE MORE IN LOOOOOOOVE!  Oh my gosh, how cute, right?

At the appointment, I was just amazed as I stared at the screen.  Somewhere hidden deep inside me is this whole little person - a person whose story has already begun, whose potential is still unknown, whose personality is all their own, whose calling is already known by God.  This is an eternal soul, an immortal being.  As I watched this little thing kicking and punching and wiggling around, all completely undetected by my own sensations, I was just in awe - yet again - that God would choose to give us such an extraordinary gift.

I know there are arguments out there against having kids, or more kids, or lots of kids.  But staring at that screen, I'm sorry, but it was evident none of those arguments hold a candle to the single argument in favor of inviting new life to dwell with us: it's a miracle.  That's all.  A miracle that we're invited to participate in, that we're invited to be blessed by: the opportunity to invest in something unique and awe-striking and eternal.  I don't care what it costs me; I unashamedly, unabashedly, unhesitatingly want to be part of that.  I do.

This is baby #7 for us as parents.  But this is the first time we will have the blessing of knowing this baby - of hearing their first words, of hearing them laugh, of discovering their passions and talents, of guiding them through their areas of weakness, of teaching them by example to need Jesus, of watching them change the world and display the Gospel in their own specific way.  It's all a gift unique to this child.  We would not have the chance to know this child if we had limited our family size before now.  And staring at that screen, I realized just what I'd be missing out on, how impoverished I would be, without this specific little one.  I'm so grateful for my riches.

SO - all that to say, please congratulate us!  Please enter into our joy with us!  Please join us in anticipating the arrival of this new, precious human person that God has uniquely, purposely created for this exact time and this exact place.  You are witnessing a miracle!

a little more on postpartum recovery, and my goals moving forward.

A while back, I posted on a few things that have helped me recover incredibly well from this birth.  Honestly, I'm not sure if I've ever had a more restful, nourishing, smooth recovery period after a baby, and I really think it's because of how intentional I was in preparing for the postpartum phase, as well as how committed I was on the back end to protecting and sticking with those decisions.  This post goes into detail about how cocooning, napping and good nutrition have made a world of difference for me.

There are a couple of other things that I feel have helped, too: Ab Rehab exercises during pregnancy, supplements, and not pushing my body to be 'normal' too soon.

Diastasis recti exercises during pregnancy. 

I started these exercises up again toward the end of my second trimester, after I stopped feeling so sick, and did them until I was too huge to do them comfortably.  (About six or eight weeks total.)  I'm going to go into more detail on this later this week, but it significantly narrowed the ab separation that was very large during pregnancy, and my current gap is much smaller than it was after Rocco (Baby #5) was born.  I have much less work ahead of me to get it to close again completely.

Supplements. 

I go into more detail in this post about the supplements I take, but I was very diligent through pregnancy and postpartum to supplement my diet with thyroid and hormone helpers.  Right now, I take a raw prenatal, vitamin D, kelp, selenium, magnesium, calcium, collagen and zinc.  I also take fermented cod liver oil - in capsules, because it's disgusting and I don't want to have to taste it!  These helped me reach equilibrium again after my health crashed in the postpartum season after Laurelai, and I try to stay on top of taking them now to help my body continue to run smoothly.

Not getting physical, physical.

I had told myself that I would wait at least twelve weeks before even starting to try to get my body back to 'normal' functioning.  I think this is so important!  I try to think about it like any other intense physical recovery - surgeries, injuries, and illness all require a bit of waiting and resting before getting too physical.  I wanted to honor what my body has done, and protect myself from injury.  So I really have spent the last three months resting and recovering, and am so glad I have.  But now here I am, fifteen weeks postpartum and ready to start moving again.

I'm getting ready to begin again with my diastasis recti exercises, and I'm going to start some other light exercise as well.  I'm also gearing up to tighten up the reins on my diet.  So get ready, because throughout the rest of the week, I'm hoping to fill you in on my current ab separation, and my plans for moving forward with that (I'll even post current photos), as well as what exercise I'll be taking up so that I can get moving again without pushing myself too hard, too quickly.  And I'll hopefully give you a rundown of the nutritional plan I'll be focusing on to help me start looking and feeling like myself again.

pregnancy update: 38 weeks. ish. i think.

Have I mentioned before that there is some confusion about my actual due date this time around?  It all started when I mistakenly gave my midwife the wrong 'first day of last period' date.  (How was I supposed to know the exact date off the top of my head?)  So my due date was set as June 30.  But then I got home and realized it should actually be June 25, according to The Math. 

But The Math never does me right - according to The Math, my babies like to overcook.  Every single one of my babies, with the exception of Penelope, was overdue, and even Penelope was only a day early.  Laurelai was twelve days late.  What has been a more accurate predictor of actual arrival date is the 20 week ultrasound - all of the kids showed up one or two days on either side of the ultrasound date.  This baby's ultrasound date is June 23.

So I've been hanging onto that date in my mind as the most realistic day to figure around.  Which means I'm about ten days away, and I'm in total denial.  I even signed up for a composting class at the library on the 24th, because I can't actually wrap my head around the possibility that in single digit days I will be giving birth.

On the one hand, I'm ready.  I have never been in this much pregnancy-related pain before.  Walking hurts, sitting hurts, laying down hurts, rolling over in bed hurts.  I have crazy heartburn and difficulty sleeping.  I get shooting nerve pain and muscle cramps all through my leg and foot at varying times of the day and night.  And I'm still dealing with blood sugar issues, so if I'm not suuuuper disciplined about what I eat, and how often, I get sick.  Plus, I'm getting to that hormonal-grouchy-weepy stage where everything just feels like the worst and no one likes being around me, for good reason.

BUT.  I'm really kind of still hoping to go past my due date, because the longer she stays in there, the longer I can put off actually giving birth and caring for a newborn.  I am familiar enough with the process by now to never, ever utter words like, "I just want to be done being pregnant," or, "Just get this baby out of me."  HECK. NO.

And of course babies are the sweetest and the tiniest and the yummiest smelling.  I know the opportunity for bonding is incredible, and finally meeting this new little life is going to be indescribable.  It's always totally and completely worth it.  That's why I do it all the time.

But if we're just talking about wanting to be done with hardship, I'm just not totally convinced that I'm in the hardest stages yet.  So I'm willing to hold out a bit longer.  Plus, if I am able to make it to that composting class, I'll get a free compost bin, which would be pretty sweet.  So I'm crossing my fingers for a late arrival.  Want to cross yours for me, too?

birth prep: planning meals ahead.

Cooking and grocery shopping are one of the most time-consuming parts of each week for me, and one of the things I hate expending energy on when I have a newborn at home.  So, prior to each baby, I've tried to make it a priority to make sure meals are covered for us for about a month.  I do this a variety of ways.

Meal Trains

The churches we've been part of have always been wonderful about setting up meal trains for us for at least the first week after we get home from the hospital, if not the first two weeks!  It makes life so simple - basically, you just fill in the dates you want meals for, let them know of any food allergies or anything (such as gluten, in my case), and then everyone just signs up by email to bring you dinner one of those nights.  SO EASY.  I'm so grateful this has been done for me in the past, and I try to participate in others' meal trains whenever I can.  (I also love bringing things like paper plates and plastic silverware, just to make things really easy.)


Freezer Meal Showers and Gifts From Others

When I was pregnant with Laurelai, a few friends threw me a meal shower, where guests brought either an already-prepared meal to go in the freezer, or gift cards for restaurants that deliver.  The past few births, I've gotten freezer meals as gifts from friends and my parents.  My mom totally stocked up our freezer last time with I-don't-even-remember how many meals.  Absolutely TONS.  Again, SUCH A HUGE BLESSING.


Make-Ahead Meals I've Prepped Myself

This is the boat I find myself in now - trying to figure out what is easy to make ahead, what freezes well, and what we would actually want to eat in those crazy postpartum days.  I have started streamlining this process by just making HUGE batches of a few different meals we already eat, so I'm doing dinner prepwork and stocking my freezer in one fell swoop.  I have learned that looking up 'freezer' specific meals or Crockpot meals on Pinterest doesn't help me much, because I often find that I'm not a huge fan of some of the new recipes, but I've got like four of the same meal left in the freezer, so we never eat them.  (And I HATE Crockpot-specific food.  I just really don't like it.  I don't mind heating up stove-top-made soup or something in there, but I don't like using it to actually cook anything.) 

A good rule of thumb has become, "Would I be excited to eat this as leftovers tomorrow?"  If the answer is yes, it's a good contender for making in large batches and freezing.

So this year's list is VERY basic.  We will be rotating a lot of the same meals over the course of the first month or so.  But they're meals Todd and I like eating that take very little time or effort to heat/cook, so basic is what works for us!  Here's what I'm planning on making ahead and having on hand:


Breakfasts for Me and the Kids:
Italian sausage and hash brown casserole
Soaked oatmeal muffins
Smoothie bags
Applesauce muffins
Cooked and frozen bacon to have on hand
Sourdough bread for toast
Cooked Italian sausage for sausage and cabbage skillet


Lunches for Me (the kids can prep their own regular veggie lunches):

THM lazy lasagna (individual servings)
Individual servings of soup, listed below
Cooked ground beef for spaghetti squash with jarred red sauce
Cooked chicken for salads


Dinners for Everyone:

Roasted Brats with Onions (x 2)

Chicken, Bacon and Rice Soup (x 3)

Broccoli Cheese Soup (x 3)

Chili (x 2)

Hamburger Soup (x 2)

Whole chicken, cleaned and seasoned for roasting (x 2)

Pot roast, seared and prepared for the oven (x 2)

Lemon chicken breasts (x 2)

White sauce for pasta night ( x 3)

Other (Cheater) Items to Have On Hand:

Pre-formed burger patties
Frozen pizza

Chicken nuggets and fries
Baggies of cooked rice and quinoa

Baggies of cooked ground beef, Italian sausage, and chicken breast

Pantry/Snack/Fill-In Items:
Apples
Peanut butter
Popcorn
String cheese
Deli meat
Deli cheese
Greek yogurt
Frozen berries

In the name of doing fewer dishes, I'll be stocking up on aluminum foil for lining casserole dishes, as well as Crockpot liners for nights that I use it to heat up soup.  I'll also be loading up on paper plates and plastic silverware.  And I'm putting it all into a grocery order for pickup/delivery to avoid having to waddle through the aisles of the store.


And that is how I plan on avoiding cooking and full-on grocery shopping trips for the first month to six weeks with a newborn!  Now, to just find the time to actually prepare all of this! (I'm having to wait until our new carpet is installed, since the deep freeze needs to be cleared out and moved off the carpet area, but the install date keeps getting pushed back!  Hopefully I'll be able to do it all next week.)

prepping for the (imminent) arrival of the newest V.V.

I've been prepping.  Not like doomsday prepping... but kind of like doomsday prepping.  Like, "Do we have enough food and supplies to last us through the lean days a-comin'?"  And now that we are just a little over two weeks from my impending apocalypse due date, I feel like it might be time to buckle down and actually get some things on my list crossed off.  Here's the list, as it stands:

1. Buy a bigger van.  We won't all fit in our minivan in two weeks, and I don't like the idea of not being able to legally drive the kids to the emergency room or something if Todd's at work and we can't split the kids up between two vehicles.  So we need a van.  Unfortunately, the kind of van we're looking isn't just widely available at any dealership.  Most of the ones we're finding are about an hour and a half away.  Which then comes with its own sub-bullet points:
         1a. Secure financing
         1b. Figure out when we'll have time to test drive

2. Square away insurance cards. (Done!) My insurance just switched last month.  I just got the new card in the mail two days ago, so that was an issue for a bit, but it has been resolved.  (Now, to get around to calling them and asking them for a PCP that isn't two hours away...)

3. Contact local doula about placenta encapsulation.  (Done!) Totally gross, I know, but totally effective.  I've done it for my last two births, and the hormonal and physical recovery was drastically better.

4. Plan freezer meals.  (I'll share my freezer meal planning with you tomorrow!)
          a. Make list of meals
          b. Grocery list/grocery order
          c. Meal train?

5. Actually cook freezer meals (but not before carpet install - no deep freeze until then).

6.  Line up kid care and postpartum help. (Done!)

7.  Baby clothes/items out, washed. (Done!)

8.  Registry made for any items we need to replace or add. (Done!)  Target offers a one-time 15% discount on anything you put on the registry, so it's nice to just have it on there so we can get the discount on stuff we were needing to buy anyway.

9.  Figure out dresser/family closet situation for clothing storage.

10. Set up our bedroom with all the newbie items I'll need close at hand. (Done!)

11. Enroll in WIC so I can rent out their hospital-grade pump.

12. Make birth plan. (Done!)

13. Set up hospital tour.

14. Plan for postpartum housekeeping help.

15.  Pack hospital bag.
          a. Remember to bring a paci and the Vitamin K drops from home!

16. Install carseat (clean it first).

18. Choose baby book. (Done!) Amazon has some adorable ones, so I put it on my registry on there.  Does anyone know if they offer a discount for registry purchases?

19. Shave legs and paint toenails.  Because nothing makes you feel less-than-human than turning yourself inside out in front of an audience of strangers.  I like to do what I can to feel at least a little less like a troll when it's all said and done.


So, really, no big deal, right?  I just need to clean out the deep freeze, make it over to WIC, schedule a hospital tour, test drive vans 1.5 hours away, get to IKEA in Kansas City to pick up a family closet setup, clear out the garage and the laundry room so I have room for a family closet setup, and shop for and cook about 25 extra meals.  Also, in the meantime, the kids have an orthodontist appointment 2 hours away, we have a carpet install scheduled for the basement (which means I need to clear all the furniture out of the basement), and we're having a raised bed garden put in on Friday.  Also, weekly doctor visits, weekly chiro visits, a hair cut appointment, and trying to cram in our last-ditch efforts at logging a bunch of school hours.

I've totally got this.  Right? RIGHT?!!?! OH MY WORD I DON'T GOT THIS I'M IN A TOTAL PANIC.

and we FINALLY have a name to announce!

No, I'm not leading you on.  Yes, I do mean we've named the new baby.  No, I will not pull shenanigans like I did last time and tell you we'll be naming her Kevin, or Brian, or Kyle.  Her very real and actual name will be...


Callista Janelle.

I would go into tons of wordy wordiness explaining why and how we came to the decision, but Todd wrote this beautiful email to her with all of that, so I'm just going to copy and paste that, since it's way better written than anything I could muster.

"Subject: the story behind your name

Team Van Voorst is proud to present…

Callista Janelle Van Voorst

Callista means "most beautiful" or "lovely." It is not a generic beauty like the type that people aspire to selfishly obtain or possess, it is of the highest, most honorable, and unique kind that inspires a person to aspire to live in a way that rises to match its splendor. It is a beauty that inspires gratitude rather than greed. It compels the onlooker to be grateful for the privilege of partaking. It is a sunset, an ocean view, a waterfall, a grand canyon, or any other of the things which photographers attempt to capture. The joy of setting your eyes upon it is enough. It makes you feel safe and scared all at the same time. It connects you to the depths of who we are and disconnects you from the mundane in which we often swim. It is a beauty that calls one to rise within oneself, to be honorable in response to observing honor, to be noble in reaction to seeing nobility, to be grander because there exists in actuality grandeur. This is the essence of the name Callista and God has granted women the unique opportunity to be the muses of a fallen world. There is a cheap beauty that men clamor to click on and then there is a beauty that causes men to pause and consider their ways, a beauty that arrests their attentions and calls them to be more than for what they have settled. Callista, may you remind people that there is a God and in such a way that inspires people to godliness by grace through faith in Christ alone, who is the very image of the invisible God, the beauty, the grandeur, the majesty that rallies souls to drink deeply the draughts of divine reality. 

Janelle means "Yahweh is gracious." Many will say it means, "God is gracious," which is true, but it refers to a particular God, not just generically to any being one might choose to call "god." It refers to the one true, Triune god, Yahweh. He is gracious. It not only states this as an emphatic fact of reality, but also, in a way, makes it clear that He ALONE is gracious. Grace is unforced and undeserved and only the one, true, uncreated God is in a position to give it as He alone is forced by no one. The god made by the hands of men owes its life to his creator. All that to say, the only God Who is, is gracious because He wants to be. The one, true, unforced, uncaused cause of all forces is the God who gave His one and only Son to save sinners because He wanted to. Janelle also happens to be the middle name of Paige's sister, Lauren, who is an exemplary woman of God who relies entirely on the mercy and grace of God provided in Jesus Christ alone and is in her own right, the kind of woman who inspires those around her to rise up and be more like Jesus.

Callista, you were not named casually or by mere cutesiness. It was with full intention and contemplation that your mom and I strived to find a name that would reflect a glimpse of what we believe with all our hearts, "our greatest joy is found in giving our entire lives to make much of Christ" Your name reinforces that reality. There is no greater aim than to know, love and obey Jesus by being known, loved and blessed by Him."

So that is how she came to be named.  We are so excited to meet her, and so happy we were able to find yet another perfect name. 

plans for a family closet.

So, I'm starting to hit that late stage of pregnancy where everything feels very imminent, and I get that 'thing' (nesting?) in me that tells me I need to do All the Projects and paint All the Things.  Last night, we were all sitting around watching a movie for family movie night, and I just kept staring at the basement ceiling, wondering how many weeks it would take me to paint the ceiling, trim, and walls of all 1000 square feet down there... and if it was realistic to hope to accomplish it before the baby comes.

I realize it's not.  I also realize it's in no way necessary at this point in life.  But I just get so itchy.  Like, I'm also currently dying to just cut a big hole in the dining room wall and put in a sliding door.  Also not realistic or necessary, even though I WANT TO SO BADLY.

So I'm turning my attention to an actual problem that needs an actual solution sooner rather than later: clothing storage.  Right now, the kids are sharing three dressers between the five of them, and there is no room for another kid's clothes.  We also don't have room for another dresser in the house.  (In fact, Todd's dresser is currently housed in the garage because we can't fit it in here.)  Conundrum. 

But you know what I do have room for?  A family closet in the laundry room.  WHAT?! Wouldn't that just be the best?  A single place to keep all the kids' clothes - one area, one piece of furniture, right next to the washer and dryer?  Angels, people.  I hear angels.

But the thing is... here is the side of the laundry room that I've set my sights on:

It's already full of bins.  So, the simple solution is to move the bins.  But this is my only storage area, so I can only move them to the garage.  Even once I've reconciled myself to the possibility of mold and mice getting into them if they're stored out there, I run into the problem of not having a ton of space there either.  But I could make space... if I take the old loveseat to Goodwill, and sell the jogging stroller and single stroller, and give our old coffee table away, and buy some shelves to get the rest of the boxes off the floor.  Simple enough, right?  Realistic to accomplish in the next few weeks?

And then I could actually set up the closet system.  I almost never hang any of the kids' clothes, so I only need to worry about getting drawers or tubs for everything.  (Their church clothes are hanging in an upstairs closet, which would probably just stay the same.)  I'm thinking I'll set up this:

via

And for drawers, I'll label these with each owner's initial and the intended contents:

via

Clothes for Rocco and the new baby would still be stored in the nursery, so I'd currently only need to use four rows of the five available.  I'd give Atticus the highest row, and down the line, and use the uppermost row for storage of right size/wrong season clothes for each of them.

You guys, I'm basically foaming at the mouth thinking about this.  I need to make this happen.  And I have basically no time in the next couple of months in which to clean out the garage, move bins, make a trip to Ikea, set it all up, move the kids' clothes into it, and set up a streamlined system before the baby comes, but I am praying hard that it can somehow miraculously happen.  I need this, people, or I'm a-scary-amount tempted to take a sledgehammer to the dining room wall.


*For some more family closet inspiration, I do have quite a few related things (and some unrelated things) pinned on this board, if you're curious.

(kind of) trim healthy(ish) preggo.

This pregnancy has been kind of rough, in the sense that I was sick for a really long time.  The daily, near-constant morning sickness didn't let up for a full twenty weeks, and even after that, it was common for me to still be really sick every few days.  I started noticing that it was much, much worse after eating starchy or sugary foods, resulting in nausea, lightheadedness, and horrible fatigue, and it was getting to the point where tasting something sweet would make my stomach turn.  So I had initially determined to cut back a bit on those things to see if that would help.  (So, you know, stop eating fourteen bagels a day.)

But then I started thinking about my track record during postpartum months with each of my kids, and those days have been especially hard on me after my girls were born.  After Penelope, I had crippling postpartum depression, anxiety, and insomnia.  That's when I discovered my issues with gluten, and lost so much weight.  I was seriously skeletal.  After Laurelai, I had thyroid issues, hormone and adrenal imbalance, and crazy weight gain.  I think I also may have been experiencing some mild postpartum depression and anxiety.  (It's hard to know, since we were also in the throes of a recent move and our first church plant, so it all kind of coalesced into a lot of crying.)

Honestly, it may just be coincidence that my girls were much, much harder to recover from, mentally and physically, than my boys were, but there also may be some kind of hormonal explanation, too.  I really don't know.  But it got me thinking about how I can best set myself up for success, both now and later, with this newest girl baby. 

So... I decided to totally cut caffeine and pretty much all refined sugar.  Also, these major life decisions coincided with the Week of Rotavirus (which will be spoken about in sotto voce around here for the rest of our days), so it was rough going.  I've traded my beloved daily cup of coffee and raw cream for some kind of herbal junk that is at least warm and uncaffeinated, but is hardly a substitute.  I've traded sugar for... not sugar.  And I've started doing Trim Healthy Mama again.

I tried once before, but felt horrible on it, plus I hate that there's so much emphasis on weird specialty ingredients.  This time around, I've simply been making normal meals that fit the plan (no erithrytol or protein powders or weird thickeners made from idk), and I have felt awesome.  I'm not sure if I'm dealing with some extent of gestational diabetes or something (I haven't seen my midwife since December, and have yet to do the test), but keeping my blood sugar balanced has made a huge difference for me.  Plus, it doesn't hurt that I'm getting so much more protein and so many more veggies in than I was before.  It has only taken me six pregnancies to get to this point.

The real test came yesterday, when I found myself at Target after church, with dipping blood sugar, staring right into the eyeball of the In-Store Starbucks.  I wanted a coffee so badly.  I was all, 'maybe I could get it skim, so then it's only carbs, and stealthily eat some of the turkey and cheese I have in my purse to keep everything balanced...' (Yes, I had turkey and cheese in my purse, wanna fight about it?)  But I held my own, guys.  And I spent the rest of the day not with my head in the toilet, so I consider that a pretty major win!


A couple weeks down, only months and months and months left to go until this baby is a toddler and I'm hypothetically no longer pregnant or postpartum.  I am going to be ordering the hugest, creamiest, sugariest mocha ever made.  And I'll probably hate it because I'd have acclimated to a low-sugar diet by then, but I'll drink the whole thing ON PRINCIPLE.  Also, I will throw all my herbal tea in the garbage.  Because I'm nothing if not principled.

what a difference eight years makes. kind of.

I was searching for something in old blog posts the other day, and came across this photo, taken at 27 weeks with Atticus.

Compare that with this photo, taken a couple weeks ago with the newest baby.

There are some very noticeable differences. (In the first photo, I look so young! And thin!  And tan!  And my front tooth hadn't yet died and turned yellow from when Atticus eventually head-butted me in the face.  And I've gotten better at decorating.)  But there are also some very noticeable similarities.  Namely, the fact that I'm basically still pregnant.  Not pregnant again, just 'still pregnant.'  At least, that's what it feels like sometimes.

It's true what they say: the more things change, the more they stay the same.  I will say, I wish I could say my muscle tone had stayed a little more the same, though I am glad my eyebrows have changed for the better.

and so it begins...

paige woke up at 11:45 pm with some serious, painful contractions.
mostly of the "don't and can't" variety.
*insert rim shot"

her water broke around 12:45 am.
we called the first nurse and paige took a shower.
we are off to the races here in a short bit.

please keep us in your prayers.
--------------------------------------
we read psalm 100 before going to bed (last night) this morning.

Psalm 100
His Steadfast Love Endures Forever

A Psalm for giving thanks.

1 Make a joyful noise to the LORD, all the earth!
2 Serve the LORD with gladness!
Come into his presence with singing!
3 Know that the LORD, he is God!
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
and his courts with praise!
Give thanks to him; bless his name!
5 For the LORD is good;
his steadfast love endures forever,
and his faithfulness to all generations.

update

(looking happier than i feel holding this particular sign...)

i had my appointments today. first, we went in for an ultrasound, which wasn't really as exciting as i thought it would be. the kid is so big that we couldn't really see him on the screen. the ultrasound tech would point out what she identified as a foot or something, but it was really hard to make out. so we're trusting she knew what she was talking about and that he's still a human baby.

then todd and i went to valentino's for lunch, which was really nice. it was nice to get to spend that extra time together, and the food was awesome. plus, this lady that worked there kept giving me compliments on how good she thought i looked... never an unwelcome compliment, especially now that i feel huge and walk around like i have a stick up my butt and a watermelon between my knees. then we started shooting the breeze with this lady, and she told us all about how her daughter is a golfer, how they were in arizona last february and she stayed with a friend and it was freezing and the friend's house smelled like cats, and how the tolls in ohio are like 10 bucks a pop, and how her husband got her a gps system. oh yes, and she has two pomeranians. ahh, rebekkah. loved her.

we went back to the doctor's after lunch for a non-stress test, which they said looked really good. the baby's heart rate is awesome and i'm contracting, which is good news.

then we met with donna, our midwife. she did an exam (which hurt like the dickens) and told me that i'm about 90% effaced and she thinks i'm dilated closer to 3 by now. she wasn't for sure, though, because it would've been too painful for her to find out conclusively. she also stripped my membranes, which is supposed to help get things started. she said that between the ultrasound (which said my fluid is low, a good sign for late pregnancy), the results of the non-stress test, and where i seem to be physically, that she thinks i should go into labor in the next couple of days. however, we scheduled an appointment for monday, and if i haven't had him by then, we'll schedule an induction.

so...relatively good news all around. i was sort of hoping they could do more to get me started, or tell me more conclusively that things would start soon, but it was good for what it was.

when i think about the fact that i'm only four days overdue, it seems like it's not that long. but these last four days have seemed like they've taken FOREVER, and i'm not sure how much longer i'll have to wait. i'll admit, it's been a pretty emotional few days. i'm just hoping hoping hoping he comes soon. i really don't want to be induced. it scares me to think about. but i also don't want to be pregnant indefinitely. so i'm hoping he comes on his own. preferably tonight? not sure if it's actually preferable or not, but it seems preferable as of right now, so i'm going with it.

seriously, this kid needs to come out. he hurts.

i had a kindergartener say the other day, "wow! are you gonna have a baby?!" i told him yes, then he was like, "that baby sure looks HEAVY." then he proceeded to try to peer under my shirt to see him. he's right. this kid IS heavy. pretty soon you'd think he'd just slip right out due to gravity. if only it were that easy.

(scratching my itchy belly with my t-rex arms)

nothing new.

still. no. baby.

i have an appointment in an hour. they'll do a non-stress test, an ultrasound, and an exam. it'll be a full day. hopefully they'll have some good news for me! who knows...

you've got to be kidding me.

still pregnant. i swear, if i hear "awww, you're still here!" at work one more time, someone's going to get a roundhouse kick to the face. i understand that "well, he can't stay in there forever" and that "he must just be really comfortable in there!" actually, my favorite conversation with a coworker took place about five minutes ago:

her: 'how are you feeling?'
me: 'to be honest, i'm pretty grumpy!'
her: 'because you're fat?'

yep. that's exactly why.

i try to keep in mind that everyone is just excited for me and trying to be helpful. i'm just a grouch.

i tried jumping on our classroom trampoline today. other than nearly killing myself by running into the filing cabinet, nothing happened. so then i sat on our big sensory ball (pretty much just a prickly exercise ball) and...nothing. this kid is stubborn. he apparently is my kid. and todd's, for that matter. but much more persistently stubborn, so more like me in that sense.

it's basically boiled down to a battle of the wills. and i will win. this kid is coming out.

10 days to go...

...and still no sign of the kid. other than that it feels like he's about to fall right out. if only it were going to be that easy.

i had to run after nikki yesterday and it was the most ridiculous thing i've ever done. i was waddle-jogging, with my arms out for balance, screaming "nikki! *breath breath breath* nikki! you forgot your *breath breath breath* papers!" i finally caught up with her....an entire city block later. she wasn't even running.

what i was carrying was the stuff that should've been in the backpack she forgot, including a picture she had drawn for me of "you. and your baby. he's naked." she gave it to me, then changed her mind and took it back. bummer. there's nothing like an adhd drawing of a naked baby inside a house.

i'm thinking the 29th for this little fella...anybody want to place bets?

(no one's allowed to bet on thanksgiving. either i would go into labor, and leave the turkey in the oven for 2 days while we're gone, or i would eat a huge meal, then puke it all up during transition. so... thanksgiving is off-limits. this message is for you, todd van voorst.)

oh, children.

i'm really excited to see what kind of crap atticus is going to say as he's growing up. kids are ridiculous. today mya told me that "some girls don't have husbands. once i saw a girl bring a panda to the grocery store because she didn't have a husband." i had no idea what she was talking about (i'm not sure she did either) but it was pretty funny.

we're only 20 days away from our due date. i seriously can't believe it. i'm really ready on the one hand, but on the other hand i can't believe it's less than three weeks away... it will be a good change, but a BIG change and i don't know that i could ever be fully prepared for it. there will be a whole new person in the world. someone who's half me and half todd. with his own face and quirks (which he'll definitely have, being as how he's our kid) and style and weird smells. it will never be just me and todd again. i may never work again. we'll have family traditions and way more messes than we do now. will he like yogurt?

so, basically, i'm ready to be done being pregnant. i'm just not sure i'm ready to have a baby. is anyone really ready though?

week 35

about a week and a half ago, we spent an afternoon in des moines and did a little shopping.

we went to motherhood maternity for the first time, since i couldn't find it the last time i went (seriously, there's one in every mall in dm except jordan creek, where the only maternity store is baby gap. who knew?) considering i only have a couple weeks to go, we just picked up some necessities and left.

we also hit bed, bath and beyond (i love that store!) and got some new bedding!! i'm so excited to put it on the bed!! i've kind of been putting it off, though, because i have this feeling that as soon as we get our brand-new, neutral-colored bedding all cleaned and put on, my water will break or something and then they'll be all gross. not that the bedding that we currently have wouldn't be gross in the same situation, but you know...

and finally, the main event that afternoon was PICKING UP OUR CRIB!! we got all paid for and loaded, and when we got it home, todd got right to work on setting it up. it didn't take long at all, and i'm so excited to see it everytime i walk in the guest room (which i guess isn't a guest room anymore and i should start referring to it as the baby room). our changing table should be coming soon as well, and then it will really start looking like a nursery instead of a catch-all room. hopefully.

and finally, on an unrelated note... after eating over two pounds of bacon by myself over the last two weeks, that craving is officially over and i couldn't be happier. our house has pretty much constantly smelled like bacon, and i wouldn't be surprised if atticus pops out smelling like hickory smoke and needing bypass surgery.

i've got the blues (which makes me crave macaroni)

i'm blue. i want our little guy to come. not too early, obviously, but i wish not-too-early was closer. does that make sense?

so, to pass the time, i will be packing the hospital bag tonight. yes, i realize we still have like 6 weeks to go. but i feel like i need to do something to get ready...

i miss my little guy.

i want some bacon, too, while we're talking about things i wish i had. atticus and bacon.

oh, also.

we found a crib!! one that i like even better than the first one, especially after learning that the first one was discontinued because of safety issues. (a baby got its head stuck between the mattress and the side. which is no laughing matter. but the image does make me giggle. i'm a horrible person.)

not only is it cuter and has way higher quality reviews from people who have already bought it, but it also ended up being cheaper due to some awesome blessings!

originally, it was like 70 dollars more expensive than the first one, which made me hesitant at first, but after talking about it with todd, we decided that it would be cheaper in the long run to buy a more expensive, higher quality crib than to have to buy multiple cheaper cribs because of poor quality.

then, with a baby gift, we received a coupon for 20% off any one baby item at babies 'r us. which saved us...exactly 70 bucks. god thing? i think so. so then i called the store to see if ordering it into the store rather than having it delivered at our house would save on shipping. yep - free shipping when ordered to the store, we just have to spend the gas money to go pick it up. AND the store was having a sale for 10% off furniture at the time we ordered it, which saved us another 30 bucks. SO. we saved 100 bucks plus shipping, making it way cheaper than the first chinese finger-trap crib we picked out.

so, all that being said, we have ordered a cute crib at a bargain! so now i'd like to introduce you to jim "nightrider" van voorst, crib to the stars:


(we will also be ordering the changing table soon.)

we'll put up real pictures once we get it! i'm so excited!