how to REALLY care for yourself (pt. 2)

A week or so ago, I started a series of posts on what Biblical self-care actually looks like.  For a recap, Biblical self-care always starts with, well, the Bible.  To know what it says, we have to read it, so that's an excellent starting point.  From there, we should also be spending time in prayer (speaking with God), time in Bible-saturated conversations with our husbands, and time in mentoring conversations with older, godly women.  From there, we ought to focus our sights on serving and caring for others.  Our self-care actually starts from outside of ourselves: allowing God to speak through his Word, his Spirit, and the spiritual advisors in our lives, and then pouring out into others according to their needs.

(To go back for a full refresher, read "The Sinister Side of Self-Care," and "How to REALLY Take Care of Yourself, Part 1.")

But after nourishing ourselves with the manna of wisdom and service, what about actual, physical things we can be doing to care for ourselves during these especially demanding seasons of life?

Let's tackle just one thing today: food.

Eat Well.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.  I know.  I get it.  First of all, everyone everywhere has a word of advice on how and what you should be eating, and second of all, is it really THAT big of a deal?

Simply put?  Yes, it really is.  God made you a body.  You don't just have a body, but you are a body, as much as you are a soul and a mind and a spirit.  As much as we want to, we can't compartmentalize our created selves.  Adam and Eve were created in the Garden as whole people, with bodies, and the separation of body and soul in the ripping of death is the result of the Fall, and our selves will be restored to wholeness one day.  Jesus himself came as God in FLESH, which is far from insignificant, and when he resurrects us, we will be resurrected into glorified manifestations of our current bodies.  Actual bodies, not just some kind of ethereal, see-through, holographic something-or-others.  Real bodies to live on the real new earth.  Our actual, physical, incarnate bodies matter to God.  So how you treat and feed and care for your body really matters.  (I really could go on and on about this, but I'll stop here for now.)

So let's talk about how to feed these precious bodies.  Often, in the world of "self-care-self-care-self-self-self!" people will fall into one of two ditches when it comes to food: over-indulgence and utilitarianism.


Over-indulgence.  The first camp is often manifested in emotional eating: "I'm stressed, so I'm going to go grab a huge mocha-frappe-whatsit-whatsit to make me feel better."  This really is fine every once in a while - God made food to taste good, and to be a comfort, and even a significant daily reminder of his goodness to us.  But a constant stream of all the sugar and caffeine in the stuff we gravitate toward literally robs our bodies of the things we need in order to do life's most important work.  Our nutritionally deficient lifestyles steal from our health - so we end up feeling more stressed, more on edge, more exhausted, less capable, less vibrant.  A constant diet of this garbage is not self-care.  It's simply self-destruction that tastes good.

I only say this as someone who is naturally geared toward high-sugar, stress-induced emotional eating.  If this is the camp you fall into, I get it, I really, really do.  But I've truly seen the dark side of living like this, and after years of comforting myself through the physical and emotional demands of early motherhood with foods that didn't nourish me, but rather stole from my health, I experienced entire years of abundance and joy and fruitfulness taken from me in the health crash that came as a result.  I was killing myself in the name of comfort and indulgence (which, in the end, wasn't all that comforting).  I can tell you food absolutely affects our physical and emotional lives, which in turn affect our relational and spiritual lives.  God never meant us to live this way.  Self-discipline in our eating is a profound form of self-care.

Okay, for the other ditch: utilitarianism.  I've fallen into this ditch myself, too.  Food is medicine, yes.  But it's not only medicine; it's also food.  And food was made to be pleasing and enjoyable and comforting, not just to fill bellies.  ("He did not leave himself without a witness, for he did good by giving you rains from heaven and fruitful seasons, satisfying your hearts with food and gladness."  Acts 14:17).

We were never meant to be slaves to our nutrition, and our pet diet plan will never actually save us from the ravages of sin and death.  We can eat paleo or plant-based or vegan or whatever, and we will still get sick.  We will absolutely still die.  Our physical food is not our salvation.  We act as though the most important health worth chasing is our physical health, and trade our spiritual freedom in the process.

I personally spent quite a bit of time enslaved to "What-If Eating" ("What if my kids are exposed to pesticides and get cancer?  What if our grains aren't all properly prepared and we get cavities and bone disease?  What if they eat sugar and get wired and their immune system is suppressed and they get sick?  What if I mess up their health?  What if I could have prevented some kind of illness?  What if other moms don't think we eat healthy enough?")  One verse I found to be extremely helpful in battling this difficult snare was Romans 14:17-18: "For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.  Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men."  My eyes need to be focused more on pursuing righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit than on added sugars and USDA labels and numbers on a scale and what Crunchy Church Mom thinks of me.  I need to enjoy food as a picture of the way I enjoy Christ.

We are a free people, ready and able to feast when the time comes to feast.  We need to be careful that we're not sacrificing our meals and bodies to the gods of Food Morality and Diet Righteousness.  God declared it all clean, and who are we to declare otherwise?  (Acts 10:15)  Training ourselves away from self-righteousness and self-salvation through food is a profound form of self-care.

This post really could have been so much longer.  For as much as the world talks about how and what we eat, the Bible somehow talks about it even more.  If there's one thing God never stops talking about, it's food.  He cares about it, because he cares about us.  Let's daily eat to nourish ourselves, and intentionally feast when it's time to celebrate.  It seems so basic, but the balance can be so hard to wrap our minds around.  Learning to discern the time and season for each is truly self-care.

how to REALLY take care of yourself. (part 1)

On Tuesday, I got a bit spicy and doled out my thoughts on our culture's current mantra of "self-care! self-care! self-care!"  To sum it up, the world is shallow, selfish, and ignorant, and wants to convince us to be, too.  To put it bluntly.

But dismantling the "weak points" (ahem, lies) of the current cultural perspective doesn't cover all that needs to be said on the topic of self-care.  It's time to take the TRUTH at the heart of it all, well, to heart.  So let's look at the Bible and form our worldview from there.

First of all, the Bible states that we are made in the image of God.  We have been entrusted with no small task when it comes to caring for something so precious to him.  Further, as women, we are uniquely equipped and called to cultivate and nourish life - especially that of our husbands and kids, and then, in the same way, ourselves.  What you would deem most important for your kids' development, prioritize for yourself - cultivate the life you've been given.

God wants what's best for you.  He wants and loves to fill you up and equip you to do the work you've been made to do.  But he has specific ways of doing this that differ deeply from what the world says will fill you up.

He has said a lot on the topic, so we'll jump right into a few right away.  If you want to truly care for yourself in a way that actually restores you...


- Read your Bible.

You didn't think I'd write a post on Biblical self-care and not include actually reading the Bible, did you?  Of course you didn't.  Here's the thing: a lot of moms have a hard time disciplining themselves in this area, myself included.  Reasons/excuses abound.  But here's the truth: Jesus tells us that "Man does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God." (Matt 4:4)  I need food, and I don't make excuses for why I don't have to eat today.  I know I need it, and so I do it - sometimes with a level of excitement, sometimes simply because I know it's necessary for my survival and well-being.  But Jesus is saying that, as much as we need food, we need God's word.

Here's an easy challenge: just pick up the Bible and read it.  You don't have to have a yearly reading plan in place.  You don't have to be absolutely certain you'll understand everything you read.  You don't have to guarantee that you'll be 100% consistent from here on out for the rest of your life.  That's okay.  Just eat the meal you're aching for - right now.  And then pick it up again later, because you'll be hungry again later.  You cannot be whole and healed without the indwelling presence of God, and he is known through his revealed Word.  Let him start restoring you, strengthening you, and empowering you through his Word for the life he has called you to carry.

"Quiet time" at our house is rarely quiet.  I would love some more protected time, but I'm just not in a season of life where that's possible right now.  But when I lower my expectations, I'm able to keep in mind that even a LITTLE bit of reading, a LITTLE bit of retention, is better than none.  It's not ideal, but I am learning I can't wait around until life is ideal.

- Spend time in prayer.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."  (Phil 4:6-7)  Why do we spend so much time feeling exhausted and worried and out of control of our lives, and yet forget to rest in the presence of the only One who is in control of anything, asking for his help, guidance, and comfort?  Prayer is connection with the Life source that gave you life and sustains your life.  The Bible explicitly states that the outcome of turning over our heaviness in prayer is peace - peace that makes no sense in light of what we're facing in our circumstances.

Martin Luther said, "I have so much to do that I shall spend the first three hours in prayer."  The more you juggle, the more time you need in prayer.  Making it an afterthought deprives you of the very thing you most need.

- Find a mentor.

In Titus 2, we see Paul charge older women with the task of training the younger women in what we can assume he deems a concise summary of the most important things: "To love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."  Basically, Paul wants you to nurture these things: your character development, and your relationships with your husband, your kids, your home, and a mentor to teach you about these things.  A relationship with an older (godly, Biblically-minded) woman is a necessity for your growth and training.  Seeking one out, and gleaning all you can from her, will feed you in a way mom groups and girls' nights and Facebook groups full of peers can't.


- Talk with your husband about the Bible.

Ephesians 5 tells us that Christ cleanses his bride, the Church, by washing her in the water of the Word, in order to present her "without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish."  Immediately thereafter, Paul says, "IN THE SAME WAY husbands should love their wives as their own bodies."  Now, obviously, the command here is to husbands - but the assumption is that the wife is receptive toward being washed.  Are we in vibrant communication with our husbands about the truest Truths?  Are we hearing his thoughts and taking his counsel and receiving these gestures as tokens of his love for us?  There is cleansing and wholeness and true nourishment in this.


- Find ways to serve others.

In seasons of exhaustion and periods of feeling overwhelmed, it is so very easy to turn inward and think only of getting our own needs met.  But we forget that the Bible would tell us that serving others is a very real need in us - we were made for this.  Galatians 6:2 tells us to "bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."  We can't fulfill our calling and be our most whole selves while we're neglecting others.  It's funny how it works.

So when we're feeling the pain points of needing to have something poured into us, that is a cue to remember that the same need exists in others, too - and in serving others, we ourselves are filled up.  We can't do this from our own strength, that's for certain.  But Christ will empower you and bless you in these efforts, and you'll find yourself filled in a way you couldn't be if you had been singularly focused on yourself.



I said it already, and I'll say it again: the Bible is not silent on self-care.  God actually cares a great deal about whether we're finding rest and refreshment and nourishment.  In fact, he has so much to say on the topic that I'm only halfway through the few I wanted to highlight!  Next week, I'll cover a few especially physical, 'earthy' ways to care for ourselves.

atticus got baptized!

Atticus decided a few weeks ago that he wanted to get baptized, so when it was announced that baptisms were being held this past weekend, he was quick to want to sign up.  We invited family down, and spent the weekend celebrating this major milestone in his life!

He spent weeks working on the outline for what he wanted to say, and it was incredible.  It was also especially exciting that Todd got the privilege of being the one to baptize him.

He was so excited.  Todd said that afterward, while Atticus was getting changed into dry clothes, he just kept saying, "I can't believe it!  I'm baptized!  I'm so excited!  I'm so happy, I feel like crying!"  It was so sweet.  I am so very happy for him, and proud of him.

Congratulations, Buddy!

speaking truth to myself in the midst of discontentment.

Lately, I've been feeling restless and discontent.  I've been looking around at other people's lives and thinking that they have it so much better than I do.  I would love to dress stylishly.  I would love a pretty kitchen and a sunnier house.  I would love to own a fully-intact couch - one that doesn't have a gaping, stuffing-bald hole in the arm, and one whose middle cushion was actually original to the piece and not bolstered underneath by a twin-size comforter.  I would love to travel, and live on an acreage, and eat amazing food that I didn't have to prepare myself, and beautifully landscape my yard.

The lie that sometimes creeps in is that those things would be more attainable if I just... If we just made more money.  If I just figured out how to fit one more thing into my day.  If I just had a smaller family, or if my kids were just a little older.  Then I could have the clean, pretty life I want.

But the truth is that I am not currently missing out on anything.  I will not miss out on anything.  When I think in terms of eternity, I already have absolutely every single thing that really matters.  Everything that will make me whole.

"He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all, how will he not with him graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32)

If God didn't spare his own Son to save me, why do I think any of these other things will truly satisfy me?  If God didn't spare his own Son to save me, why do I so often suspect he's holding out?  If God didn't spare his own Son, why am I looking to petty things like circumstances and possessions, rather than sanctification and holiness, to be the indicators of my growth and blessings?  If God didn't spare his own Son, how could I question his generosity?

Because I am in Christ, I am no longer limited by finitude and mortality.  I will live on the new earth, seeing everything I missed, eating everything I missed, experiencing everything I missed - but all in its perfect state.  I will have a beautiful home, with everything I need.  And what's more, I will someday have a perfected heart that will rest content in all of that.  So I can freely spend this season of my eternal life investing where I'm at without needing it to be different.

I have been having to actively remind myself that I am missing nothing.  There is nothing I could be missing in Christ.  Looking around at the blessings others have received is only helpful if it causes me to praise God for his generous hand in their lives.  But the second I let it serve to highlight all the things I wish I had, it quickly turns to comparison, envy, and self-pity, and that's not who I want to be.  That's not who I was made, and called, to reflect.

So, today I'm choosing contentment - not because everything in my life has arrived, and I feel fantastic about every single thing I have going on right now.  But because I know who God is, and what he's done, I can feel the freedom to be content.

But godliness with contentment is great gain, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.

But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness...

As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life.

(1 Tim 6: 6-11, 17-19)

visiting the cemetery, and thoughts on leaving a legacy.

There's an historic cemetery right down the road from the building where we hold church, and for a while now, Todd has been wanting to go check it out.  (Because he knows how to party, if that's not obvious.)  So on Saturday, we chucked the kids in the car and drove over there.

It was small and beautiful, and so old.  One stone marked the grave of someone born in 1700.

The history geek in me was hopped up on a contact high.  (The 'mother of preschoolers' in me was popping homeopathic anxiety tablets while I tried to keep the running, shouting, climbing and other various attempts at grave desecration to a minimum.)  It was so amazing to think about all of the life that cemetery held - parents, children, husbands, wives.  Every single grave marked a story.

It was a family cemetery, and it was small, and there were so many infants and toddlers commemorated.  It was sobering to think about how much pain a single extended family experienced.  There was one tombstone marking the grave of a seventeen-year-old, who was remembered as 'a clever and talented youth.'  That struck me - if you had to sum up your young adult child's life in a brief sentence, what could you even say?  It seemed so affectionate in its brevity.

It seems like a weird place to take kids, I know.  But, as Christians, we actually talk about death pretty often with our kids.  Not in a morbid, sinister kind of way, but in a way that is absolutely necessary and foundational to our faith.  Jesus died.  We will die, too.  Our sins warrant eternal, never-ending death, but Christ in his goodness died so that we can live.  In Christ, we die every day to ourselves, and we identify with him in both his crucifixion and his resurrection.  Though we die with him, we'll be raised with him.

No, it's not the most pleasant thing we discuss, but in Christ, death loses its sting.  It's the final enemy, and Christ has conquered it already, so we don't need to be afraid of it.  So while it's not something we talk about constantly, it's far from a taboo topic at our house.  So the trip to the cemetery was a really great opportunity to talk to the kids about how we all have only one life to live, and how our days matter because we aren't given an endless supply.  We talked a lot about Ecclesiastes, in the spirit of chapter 7, verse 2: "It is better to go to a house of mourning than to a house of feasting, for this is the end of all mankind, and the living will lay it to heart."


The next day, Todd preached at Anthem - "coincidentally," over Psalm 127 and Christian legacy: how we ought to think about the time we've been given, and how we ought to use it.  It was a really, really powerful message - you should take a listen!

morning quiet time with the kids.

I've kind of been slacking on my 'quiet time' routine lately - it had been the case for a while that I was really consistent, but then I fell off the wagon.  Chalk it up to a combination of things: Callista is still an inconsistent sleeper at night, so the exhaustion caught up with me; I started spending my morning time making breakfast for myself and Todd before he headed to work instead of reading; I eventually got pretty far behind in my Bible read-through schedule, so I got discouraged and lost motivation; yadda yadda yadda.

Combine this with the fact that we hadn't really instated any kind of structured Bible time for the kids, and the guilt was hitting me pretty hard.  The kids weren't reading their Bibles.  Like, ever.  I wanted to change that for them, and I also wanted to be setting a better example.

So when I put together my visual schedule, I decided to add in a routine Bible time for all of us, and so far it has been working!

So, basically, the way it's been happening has seen me getting up around 8:00 or a little after to make everyone's breakfast.  Now that the kids can tell time, I've told them to plan on cleaning up their rooms at about 8:20, so we can sit down at the table around 8:30.  We read until 9:00ish, and then I put breakfast on the table.  So far, the start time hasn't been as ironclad as would probably be good for us, but it's at least a jumping-off point.

The biggest two kids, being fluent readers, are required to spend time in the Word.  The younger ones are given the option of either sitting with us to look at illustrated storybook Bibles, or continuing to play until breakfast.  Rocco just kind of wanders around, making a bunch of noise and generally being as distracting as possible.

Is it efficient?  Absolutely not.  Some days I only finish about a chapter... in thirty minutes.  Every other word, I'm interrupted.  It's frustrating at times.  Do the kids love it every single day?  No.  And that was hard for me at first - I didn't want time in the Bible to be seen as a chore.  But then I had to realize that, just like anything that's ultimately good for them, and anything I hope they would eventually choose for themselves, I have to train them.  Self-discipline begins parent-directed discipline when they're young.  And honestly, once they're sitting down and reading, they do enjoy it - they just need the little external nudge to start.

So, there it is.  It's simple, but it is a step in a good direction, and I'm feeling good about it!

there are no cookies in heaven.

If you are friends with me on Facebook, you may have already seen a snippet of this exchange between Penelope and Laurelai, but I was so touched by this email Todd sent the girls that I just had to share it with you!  (All our kids have their own email addresses, the passwords to which they'll receive when they're older.  Todd uses these to send little notes, and Bible-thoughts, and memories that they'll be able to sift through later on.)

Here's what he wrote to the girls:

Saturday night after tucking everyone into bed, I heard a call to come back to the girls' room. When I entered, Penelope sheepishly said, "I have some exciting news." In fact, you said it so shyly, I couldn't make it out the first time and had to ask you to repeat the statement. After your repeated it, I replied with the natural follow up question, "What's your exciting news?" You responded by saying, "I think I may have just changed Laurelai in to a Christian." Suffice it to say, I wasn't expecting news of that nature. After digesting that statement for a moment, I asked you to explain to me how it happened. You walked me through how you were sharing with your little sister about sin, salvation, Heaven, Hell, repentance and forgiveness. You said that Laurelai said she wanted to believe in Jesus and you helped her through a little prayer to that effect. 

Then I heard Laurelai say, "Daddy, I have some sad news." I was expecting this to be related to Penelope's exciting news and take the form of something like, "The old Laurelai is dead," or some half of the Gospel truth, but instead, what you said was, "There are no cookies in Heaven!" Penelope hearing this piped in, "That's not what I said! I said, 'There is no SUFFERING in Heaven!'"

So who knows what Laurelai actually understood of what Penelope said, but a couple of encouraging details I gathered from the night were that Penelope is trying to make disciples and sharing the Gospel with her siblings, and Laurelai wanted to go to Heaven, EVEN if there were no cookies there. That is a pretty big commitment for a 4 year old. An eternity without cookies is a expensive price to pay in the imagination of a 4 year old, but you were ready to pay it in order to be a Christian.

I love you girls and I love seeing God working in your lives and through you both. May this be the first of many conversations and commitments to Jesus by all parties involved.

it's a two-fer! just to prove mondays really are the best.

Today I have not just one, but two vlogs to share with you!  Look at me, learning how to work the internet with aplomb!

Marriage Monday, Episode 3: Insist on Being First

Sharing the Gospel With Our Kids Through Discipline and Correction

my kids fight with each other. i just thought you should know.

I was talking to my sister the other day, and saying how I wish I didn't feel so alone in struggling with my kids' bickering.  I get why it isn't talked about much in parenting circles: we really have little right to be airing our kids' sin struggles to the whole world.  It's my job to cover their multitude of sins, just like I would hope that someday they will be gracious and forgiving with my multitudes and multitudes of sins, when faced with the opportunity to air them in public.  That's what love does.

However, it is possible to discuss it honestly without going into the specifics that would throw my kids under the bus.  So if you're in the same boat, here's some company for your misery:  my kids bicker.  I often feel frustrated and unequipped to deal with it.  It sometimes feels like I'm failing, and it sometimes feels like it's pointless to even try to combat it.  I yell way too often, and I'm guilty of just wanting them to knock it off instead of putting the work into addressing the heart behind what's happening.

I have no answers.  Is that comforting?  I think sometimes that would comfort me to hear from other Christian moms - to know that managing frustrating relationships between kiddos seems it's just par for the course.  To be reminded that they really do struggle with sin, and it will feel like it.  To be cheered on knowing that it can't be 'controlled,' and the best we can hope for is to take the perspective that each opportunity for correction is yet another opportunity to share the Gospel.  Not because it will 'fix' them, but because it is powerful to make them new, which will then motivate them to love the things worth loving: peacemaking.  generosity.  kindness.  It will come - but only with lots and lots and lots of opportunities for correction and discussion, which seem to be most present in the midst of lots and lots and lots of offenses.

So take heart if that's where you're at.  It's where I'm at, too.  There is no fix.  There is just endless opportunity to enter the ring on their team, and to trust the Holy Spirit to do the work in them that we can't.  I needed this reminder, and need it fresh every day.  Maybe you do, too.

teaching the liturgy to our kids.

I didn't have a strong church background before I started attending a Lutheran church with a friend in middle school.  While Todd and I haven't chosen to be part of a traditionally liturgical church in our adulthood, we have a really deep love for church history and the comfort that believers have found for hundreds of years in the creeds of orthodox Christianity.

Earlier this year, I was prayer journaling, and suddenly a Lutheran confession of prayer immediately rose to mind - a prayer I had recited dozens, or maybe even hundreds of times in my pre-conversion days without giving much thought to it.  But in reciting it recently, I found so much comfort in the deep truth I had unknowingly and almost effortlessly stored away in my heart and mind in those years.

Most merciful God,
We confess that we are in bondage to sin and cannot free ourselves.  We have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done and by what we have left undone.  We have not loved you with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves.  For the sake of your Son, Jesus Christ, have mercy on us.  Forgive us, renew us, and lead us, so that we may delight in your will and walk in your ways, to the glory of your holy name.
Amen.

It got us talking about the importance of liturgy, tradition, and rote memorization in the life of faith.  While I don't think it should make up the entirety of our interactions with God, it is so helpful to enter into words and actions that have been clung to for generations.  So because our church isn't liturgical, Todd has really started making it a priority at home to help our kids memorize and understand some of the creeds and foundational texts.

One thing that has really helped us is finding resources where they're set to music, to make it easier for the kids to enter in, and quicker for them to memorize.  Here are a couple of our family's current favorites!

In Wednesday's video post, I'll be talking about other ways we initiate faith discussions with our kids in our everyday lives, so make sure to check that out!



*Unrelatedly, just a reminder that today's Marriage Boot Camp vlog will post today at 10 a.m. CST on my YouTube channel.  (Will someone let me know if that link works?)  I'll be talking about one tiny, seemingly insignificant word that has made a huge difference in my communication with Todd, and can likely help you, too - I bet you'll be surprised to find out what it is.

not to brag or anything.

Luther nailed the 95 theses to the church doors 500 years (and one day) ago!  Fast forward to four days ago: Todd got the privilege of preaching the topic of the Reformation and the timeless Gospel...  and he killed it.  If you have the time, you really should listen - it was so good.

To listen for yourself, go here and click on the most recent listing.

penelope got baptized!

Yesterday morning was a baptism service at church, and Penelope chose to get baptized!  It was so great, and I am so proud of her.

A few months ago, we were in Aldi, and Penelope suddenly said something like, "I think I'll get baptized when I'm 23 or 24."  So I asked her why she would want to wait so long.  "Because I'm afraid of going under the water." 

So we talked about how the Bible tells us to "repent, believe and be baptized."  She had already done the first two items on that list - God tells us that the next step is to be baptized in obedience.  Without pushing her, I asked her if she thought obedience gets easier or harder the longer we wait, and I asked her why she thought she'd be less scared of the water when she's 23 or 24.  Advancing age doesn't always cure our disobedience problems or our fears.

Something in her just 'clicked.'  She started talking about wanting to get baptized, and Todd started discussing with her what she thought it means to be baptized, and asking her about her testimony - the story of her life before faith, how she came to know Jesus, and her life since becoming a Christian.  After a few months of gentle discussions (and a time or two of choosing not to sign up for earlier baptism services, because she was afraid of sharing her testimony from stage), she finally decided to dive in. (Bah dum bum CHHHH.)

She looked so tiny up there, reading her testimony, and even tinier once she got into the baptism tank.  (We're a church plant that meets in the conference room at a local hotel; our baptismal is a horse trough.)

It was indescribably amazing to watch my tiny daughter tell our church family about her faith in Jesus, and the truly supernatural work of the Holy Spirit in her life.  It was even more amazing to watch Todd baptize her.  One of the best days of my life, by far.

After she got dried off, she got to get dressed in a new white dress, and we had a small little lunch party at our house for the family that came into town to celebrate with us.

I am so proud of my girl, and so happy for her!  The friend that takes photos and video of things like this at church told us that he'd send us the video - when I get that, I'll be sure to post it!

daily quiet time printables.

Last week I promised I'd cook up a couple of printables that might make consistency in prayer and Bible reading a little easier to achieve.  A chart like this has been majorly helpful for me in beginning to develop a more faithful prayer life lately - seeing my own progress over time each month has really spurred me on to keep going!

My own prayer log, photocopied from the back of the book, "The Heart of a Woman Who Prays," by Elizabeth George.

I used the same basic idea, but streamlined the look a bit.  I have a love-hate relationship with the idea that resources for women always have to have swirly-girly fonts and watercolor florals.  You know I love watercolor florals, but a) I thought we could all use a little break from them for just a second, and b) I have no idea how to put watercolor florals onto something like this.  So you're stuck with the basics.

The one I put together for you guys, of which I then took terribly lit phone photos.  Hooray!

These are pretty basic, but effective!  The instructions are simple: just keep this little sheet close to your Bible or prayer journal (I actually made it so you can fold it into thirds - the perfect size for a bookmark!), and each day that you spend time in pursuit of God, highlight the date.  That's it!  Watch yourself get more and more consistent with each mark on the page.

More badly-lit phone photos! Happy Monday!

I made three different styles: one for tracking daily prayer, one for daily time in the Word, and one for quiet time in general.  Use one or all of them!  Each file contains a black and white copy and a color copy.  (Click each title link to download.)

*Edited to add: my friend LisaGrace mentioned in the comments that she printed the Bible Reading tracker on one side of a sheet of paper, and the Prayer tracker on the other so she can track each individually.  I think I might steal this idea from her myself!


Daily Bible Reading:

Daily Prayer Log:

Daily Quiet Time:

Hope you find these as helpful as I have!

my personal quiet time: prayer. (and my favorite resources!)

Yesterday, I gave you an in-depth look at what my daily time in the Bible has been looking like lately.  Today I thought I'd share what's been helping me grow in the area of prayer, which hasn't come very naturally to me and therefore has required some intentionality.

Prayer

Some people seem to find it so easy to pray consistently; I have had a very sporadic history with prayer that has been closely tied to my emotional state at any given time.  If I'm riding a spiritual high, I pray.  If I'm deep in a spiritual depression, or red-hot angry at God for whatever reason, I pray.  If I'm desperate to find my retainer (hypothetical situation, obviously), I pray.  But on most normal, run-of-the-mill days, I just can't figure out how to do it.  I can't figure out how to even want to do it.

This summer, my friend Monica and I set out to learn more about prayer, and to commit ourselves more intentionally to growing in this area.  While it still isn't easy, it's becoming more consistent for me, at least.  Here are a few things that have helped:

A prayer notebook, in which I keep lists of asked and (as it happens) answered prayers for myself, my family, others, ministry, etc., as well as decisions I need to make that I would like to pray over, instead of just prayer-lessly rushing into stuff like I usually do.

A prayer journal, in which I quickly write out a prayer each day.  This seems to keep my mind focused and helps me remember later what I even prayed for that morning!

A book of prayers written by someone who's better at praying than I am.  I've started reading daily prayers from the book, "Setting Their Hope in God: Biblical Intercession for Our Children" by Andrew Case, which is so very helpful.  The prayers are drawn almost entirely from Scripture, and I like to insert each kiddo's individual name as I quietly read each day's short prayer.

And last, but far from least, is one simple but embarrassingly effective tool for becoming more consistent: the sheet of paper.

This daily prayer chart was printed at the back of the book, "The Heart of a Woman Who Prays," by Elizabeth George.  (An identical chart for Bible reading can be found at the back of the book, "A Woman After God's Own Heart," by the same author, a book which I would recommend to everyone.)  I have found that the accountability (and even self-competition) this simple little print-out provided for me was one of the kicks in the pants I needed to get started.  I just highlight the days I sit down to pray.  Easy peasy.

You can see that I initially didn't do so hot.  I was supposed to have started in April.  Which is blank.  May had five days highlighted; June had six.  But I developed a desire to do better each month, to think in terms of 're-starting' each day, rather than feeling like the whole effort was ruined if I missed a day.  And progress toward my long-term goal is easily seen and kept track of!  Such a simple, useful tool. 

I'll be making a free printable of a similar prayer chart available by the end of the week, so stay tuned.  Do you think something like this could help you become more consistent in your quiet time?  Or, if you're already pretty consistent, what has been something you've found super helpful?

my personal quiet time: Bible reading and memorization.

Quiet time is something that tends to go in seasons for me.  Sometimes, I will go days, or even (shhhh!) sometimes weeks without sitting down for intentional quiet time.  These are not shining stretches for me, but it is the truth.  In other seasons, I rarely go more than a day in between intentional, set-aside time in which to read the Bible, pray, and reflect.

Right now, I'm spending a lot of time focusing on growth in this area, and attempting to become more consistent.  There have been a couple of things that have really assisted me in daily consistency and more fruitful time with God.

Bible Reading

This Jen Wilkin talk on how your quiet time should change you, and this article (also by Jen Wilkin) on Bible literacy have been super helpful.  She really challenged me to not expect some kind of super spiritual experience every time I opened the Bible (which rarely happened, and it would leave me disappointed, unmotivated, and feeling like I'd failed), but rather to treat the Bible like a book.  We read books to learn, enjoy, and grow - and often, if they're great books, we read them over and over, and find ourselves continually influenced by them in new ways.  Now, the Bible is more than just a book.  But, as Jen says, it is not less than a book.  So I have chosen the book of John to read, front to back, over and over, for a few pass-throughs now and I'm finding the immersion in the same material for a long time is making my own experience with the book much deeper.

I'm also jumping in to this community as we read through the entire Bible, beginning today and going through May.  I love that there's a Facebook group for encouragement and accountability, weekly videos, and even an app you can sync with your Bible app so you can either read through or listen to the audio on your phone.  It starts today - anyone want to jump in with me?

Scripture Memory

Jen Wilkin (again!) says that the easiest way to memorize Scripture is to just read it over and over.  I think that is so insightful and challenging, and I would also like to add that I've found the opposite to be true, too: the easiest way to read (and know) Scripture is to memorize it.

A few years ago, my friend LisaGrace and I memorized the book of Galatians together, and while I don't still have it memorized word-for-word, I do still know that book better than any other in the Bible.  The themes, metaphors, specific stories, and references to the Old Testament are still mentally available to me in a snap - in essence, more than any other book of the Bible, I feel like I internalized the "point" of Galatians as I memorized it, repeating the words over and over to myself out loud, in my mind, and on paper to get it to 'stick.'  It helped me understand what it means to really meditate on Scripture.

So I have decided to start this exercise with John as well.  I'm not sure if I'm committing to memorizing the whole book (Galatians is only six chapters; John is 21!), but I'm starting and will see how far I get!


So, as for what this actually looks like daily: I typically get up around 8:00,  sit down and spend 10-15 minutes in intentional prayer (more on that tomorrow!), then I spend around 10 minutes reading a chapter of John and 5-10 minutes working on new Scripture memory.  While the new Bible reading plan will likely take longer to get through each day than I've been spending, it's still all very do-able, which is why I think I've been able to stay pretty consistent in these areas over the last four months or so.  Tomorrow, I'll show you more about my time in prayer, including some of the resources I've found most helpful!

growing in my prayer life.

This summer, a friend of mine and I were talking about how we both have kind of sucked at having an actual, thriving prayer life.  Sure, we prayed, but we'd like to grow more committed to the actual act of developing a deeper life of prayer.

So we picked out a book to read through together, and were excited to jump in... but the book was a huge letdown.  Like, for real. We both hated it.  (I don't even think my friend finished it.)  And I was getting ready to just throw in the towel and be all, "I guess that didn't work.  Back to same-old, same-old."

But I was suddenly struck with the conviction that I'd been given God's Word - why was I waiting around for some Christian bookstore pick to light a fire in me?  In the Bible, I'd already been told to pray, been given examples of prayer, and shown stories of people praying.  What more was I looking for?

And I'm apparently not the only one confused about prayer - the disciples even asked Jesus how they should pray.  My problem was that I wasn't even asking.  I just figured that, because it wasn't natural or easy for me, it was okay to wait around until some monumental shift spontaneously occurred inside me, and all of a sudden I found myself happening upon a deep prayer life.  And if it didn't, I'd just continue to think, "Welp, I guess I'm just not a pray-er."

But the thing is, all Christians are called to be pray-ers.  What made me think it was easy or natural for most people?  What made me think that all "prayer warriors" didn't have to commit to it, but instead were just born that way?  And, if it doesn't come easily to me to do something we're all supposed to be thriving in, isn't that my cue to work harder at becoming good at it, rather than my cue to just give up?  How can I be so apathetic towards building a deeper, more dependent relationship with God, simply because I wasn't born with an inherent sense of ease with it all?

Many of the most 'talented' individuals in any field get to the top by a little bit of inborn talent and a crap ton of hard work.  Why would pray-ers be any different?  So if I want to be someone who truly lives a life of thriving, deep prayer, I should be prepared to commit.

So I've been making changes over the last few months.  First of all, that means I've been trying to pray more often.  It also means I've been trying to pray more intentionally - not just assuming that my random prayers throughout the day were a nourishing enough diet to live on, but rather setting aside additional time to focus on nothing other than praying.  And I've been trying to learn more about the actual act of prayer - if Jesus gave the disciples a straight answer when they asked how they should pray, then maybe "how should I pray?" is a valid question.

Does anyone else have difficulty feeling like their prayer life is really nourishing them?  Anyone else wanting or needing to grow in this area?  I am so stinking far from having all the answers!  But I'm slowly learning, and maybe being okay with a slow learning process is at least one of the answers I'm finding.  Next week, I'm going to share more about what my quiet time looks like currently, including how I've gradually implemented a few new habits out of my desire to connect with God more intimately through prayer.