my way of making friends in the neighborhood.

a couple of months ago, todd took me shopping for some new clothes.  i needed new clothing - it was not a matter of vanity or frivolity.  my wardrobe was slowly dwindling as clothes got donated to goodwill, sold, or worn out (which tends to happen when you refuse to get rid of shirts you bought in high school).  and i needed everything - from jeans to shorts to shirts to sandals to undies.

so, yes.  i bought new undies a couple months ago.  and i am not one to scrimp on underwear.  i don't know why, either...i'm perfectly happy to pay the least amount necessary when it comes to most other things:  food, shirts, furniture from the as-is section in ikea.  but not undies.  which ends up meaning a couple of things:  i don't buy new ones very often, and when i do, i have a hard time letting go of the ones that may be a little past their prime, because i know how much i paid for them.

this time around, though, i had recently purchased some drawer organizers (no, not drawers organizers, mom) at ikea. and since i couldn't just stuff old underwear into the back corner of an uncontrollably messy drawer anymore, it was becoming obvious that it was time to bite the bullet and out-with-the-old the ones that really shouldn't still be hanging around.

so lots of undies got cut from the team.  i will not lie, i finally got rid of these two pairs that i bought myself for christmas when i was a sophomore in high school.  which was ten whole years ago.  i told you i have a problem letting go.

but i ran into a dilemma:  you can't sell used underwear.  and you can't donate it - that's like giving a quarter to a waitress as a tip; it's more offensive than if you didn't give anything at all.  like i think someone deserves the level of pity that it takes to reasonably expect that they would be thrilled to take years-old underwear belonging to a stranger.

so what to do with all the sad, pathetic, loser, elderly underwear?

they ended up getting tossed in the trash.  which was sad, but strangely cathartic in a 'this old underwear can't hold me back from my true potential any longer' kind of way.

and i have to say that i have ended up being nothing but happy about this decision for a number of reasons, including but not limited to the following:

1. my friend amy helped me fold my laundry the other day, and i was able to be only grateful rather than mostly grateful but a little humiliated by what she could possibly find.  that was liberating.

2.  our trash guy used to avoid eye contact and would flick his cigarette butts at our house when he saw my kids watching him dump our garbage.  now he waves and smiles.  could be unrelated, but if not, he seems to be genuinely happy for me that i'm no longer hindered by my hoard of ancient undies.  or maybe he's just laughing at me because he has now had the opportunity to glimpse twenty pairs of the good, the bad, and the ugly aspects of my underwear drawer.  (actually, just the bad and the ugly.  so who's laughing now, trash guy?)


Anonymous said...

Garrett thinks that I need to upgrade my "homeless" look to something a little bit more classy because I have hardly any clothes that are decent. Underwear included!

Amy said...

I'm so glad I could be a part of helping you clean out and refresh your stock of undies. It makes me feel privileged. =)