stupid tiny feminists.

so, after school today i headed up to north grand to check out the farmer's market (which was so-so. i was looking for cheap such luck). however, when i got there at 2:30, i saw the sign that said it didn't start until 3, so i figured i'd walk around jcpenny for a while to kill time.

i looked around a bit for the maternity section, just to see what they had. i walked past it a couple times before i realized that a four-racks-and-a-wall-display section was the maternity section. the only way i figured this out was by eyeballing all the petites clothing (cute tiny cable-knit sweaters and whatnot for cute tiny ladies) and accidentally stumbling on the next rack over...the paisley polyester potato sacks they like to call "maternity wear."

seriously. i think the jcpenny layout designer and maternity fashion director must both be fascist, baby-hating, tiny feminists who want to make preggers ladies feel bad for reproducing. "hey, i have a good idea. let's put maternity right next to petites to highlight how tiny the ladies are who actually shop in petites, especially compared to the big, swollen, water-retaining baby incubators. eww, pregnant people are gross."

then, to make it easier to spot us from long distances, they incorporated hideous, brightly printed tops made of fabric sure to make us sweat (for easier smell detection). that way, anyone who may not have otherwise known we were pregnant can spot us coming and cross to the other side of the street before we infect them with our fertility.

i hate jcpenny. it's too bad they have sales all the time, otherwise i'd boycott.


Anonymous said...

Oh wow, that made me laugh pretty hard! Maternity clothes really suck and are pretty much all hideous. I think all maternity clothes designers are in their late 60's and miss the way things used to be. And they are stinkin' expensive too! I never did find any I really did like except when it came to nursing bras. Head to Motherhood Maternity in Valley West. They have the most comfortable sleep bras and they are around 10 bucks.

tivo vovo said...

maybe you've got it all wrong. perhaps the maternity section gave birth to the tiny, tiny petite section.