wow, it's been a long time since i've written a 'that's how we roll' post, but lo, today is the day to break that sad cycle. this post brought to you courtesy of mcdonald's.
todd: you should make chicken stock out of 'mighty wings' bones. i bet people would pinterest that.
***
penelope (rubbing barbecue sauce all over her mouth): i'm putting on lipstick!
atticus (copying, by rubbing sweet and sour sauce all over his mouth): me too!
todd: no, atticus, sweet and sour sauce is lip gloss. only barbecue sauce is lipstick.
***
penelope: how do they get the chicken in the chicken nuggets?
***
todd: you guys sure are affectionate on mcdonald's night.
me: it's probably all those crazy endorphins your brain releases when you eat mcdonald's.
todd: you mean McDorphins.
***
and that's how we roll.
Showing posts with label that's how we roll.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label that's how we roll.. Show all posts
thwr: ole.
lauren: oh shoot! there's a burrito in my purse!
paige: ...what?!
lauren: i can't even tell you how many bags i've ruined by leaving mexican food in it. i think the official number is four. it's usually tacos, though.
and that's how we roll.
paige: ...what?!
lauren: i can't even tell you how many bags i've ruined by leaving mexican food in it. i think the official number is four. it's usually tacos, though.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: not exactly the westminster confession, but getting there.
atticus: god made everything and god will make me. we must enjoy him and we must color.
and that's how we roll.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: that would be a very literal hot mess.
paige: i had a dream a while back where i found a vending machine that served fried chicken.
todd: that's...disgusting.
paige: what?! it's the best idea i've had in a long time. it's too bad i was unconscious at the time.
and that's how we roll.
todd: that's...disgusting.
paige: what?! it's the best idea i've had in a long time. it's too bad i was unconscious at the time.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: a lesson in positive thinking from todd van voorst.
todd: i bet most people think of potentially having a disability as a bad thing. they put it in the 'con' column, but they get to park closer to the door at church. and i'm like, COME ON, let's keep our heads here people. we're christians, the last bastion of silver lining in this world. we should be like, 'see a chipmunk eating a nut? winter's not so bad. spring is just around the corner.'
and that's how we roll.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: feel right at home.
(giving some friends a tour of the house)
todd: and this is our laundry room.
atticus (walking into the bathroom and spinning around): this is our bathroom. (walking over to the toilet.) this is where i poop.
and that's how we roll.
todd: and this is our laundry room.
atticus (walking into the bathroom and spinning around): this is our bathroom. (walking over to the toilet.) this is where i poop.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: money matters
paige: the baby is freaking.out. right now.
todd: why do you think that is?
paige: i don't know; probably heard about the current economic crisis.
and that's how we roll.
todd: why do you think that is?
paige: i don't know; probably heard about the current economic crisis.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: in which todd shows off his mouthy side.
as we were getting on a plane with the kids, who really ended up being fantastic the entire flight.
lady on plane: (loudly to neighbor) if i had known kids were going to be on the plane, i would have taken a different flight.
todd: (just as loudly) yeah, because kids are the WORST.
the lady did not find that amusing, but you know what? we didn't find it amusing that she automatically assumed that kids she didn't even know, who would be sitting 20 rows behind her, were going to ruin her flight. and that she had the cahones to say that right in front of the kids' parents: she didn't even wait for us to get past her before commenting - she said it while we were standing three feet away. in my humble opinion, that lady deserved a punch to the jugular.
so, while i'm glad todd didn't actually start throwing punches and get us kicked off the plane, i am hoping that lady got shamed into at least keeping her mouth shut next time. parents have enough to deal with while raising toddlers than to have to hear about how 'inconvenient' their kids are to people around them. plus, who's to say that we don't actually really like and enjoy our kids and hate hearing when other people assume they're horrible to be around? what's so freaking wrong with VALUING children?
well, not on todd's watch, lady. open your ugly trap again and your flight will suck at the hands of the furious five (our team name when we're mad).
lady on plane: (loudly to neighbor) if i had known kids were going to be on the plane, i would have taken a different flight.
todd: (just as loudly) yeah, because kids are the WORST.
the lady did not find that amusing, but you know what? we didn't find it amusing that she automatically assumed that kids she didn't even know, who would be sitting 20 rows behind her, were going to ruin her flight. and that she had the cahones to say that right in front of the kids' parents: she didn't even wait for us to get past her before commenting - she said it while we were standing three feet away. in my humble opinion, that lady deserved a punch to the jugular.
so, while i'm glad todd didn't actually start throwing punches and get us kicked off the plane, i am hoping that lady got shamed into at least keeping her mouth shut next time. parents have enough to deal with while raising toddlers than to have to hear about how 'inconvenient' their kids are to people around them. plus, who's to say that we don't actually really like and enjoy our kids and hate hearing when other people assume they're horrible to be around? what's so freaking wrong with VALUING children?
well, not on todd's watch, lady. open your ugly trap again and your flight will suck at the hands of the furious five (our team name when we're mad).
thwr: entirely appropriate, i think.
paige: it just wouldn't be christmas without visiting an adult superstore.
thwr: we are politically correct.
todd: (singing) WAR....UH...what is it good for?...killingsadamhussein. i said, WAR...UH...
and that's how we roll.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: handing almost all of it over to god.
atticus: god attee frinn?
mama: yes, god is atticus' friend!
atticus: thomas attee frinn?
mama: oh...yeah...thomas [the train] is atticus' friend, too, i guess.
atticus: god thomas frinns?
mama: yes, god and thomas are both your friends.
atticus: god have-it thomas?
mama: aww, sweet pea! can god have your thomas?
atticus: NO.
and that's how we roll.
mama: yes, god is atticus' friend!
atticus: thomas attee frinn?
mama: oh...yeah...thomas [the train] is atticus' friend, too, i guess.
atticus: god thomas frinns?
mama: yes, god and thomas are both your friends.
atticus: god have-it thomas?
mama: aww, sweet pea! can god have your thomas?
atticus: NO.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: NOT the end of times.
todd: wouldn't it be funny if one of harold camping's friends tried to make him feel better by saying, 'don't worry harold, everyone makes mistakes; it's not the end of the world'?
and that's how we roll.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: our take on gender roles
todd: i guess we know who wears the pajama shorts in this relationship.
and that's how we roll.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: atticus is finally conversational!
atticus: (laughing hysterically)
mommy: what's so funny?!
atticus: tooting!!
mommy: haha, what do you say?
atticus: 'NOTHER ONE! 'NOTHER ONE!
and that's how we roll.
mommy: what's so funny?!
atticus: tooting!!
mommy: haha, what do you say?
atticus: 'NOTHER ONE! 'NOTHER ONE!
and that's how we roll.
thwr: what lies beneath.
paige: even though we're not going to church today, i guess i should put on some clean underwear.
and that's how we roll.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: how paige could've been a successful one-hit wonder.
todd: day-o. oh, daaaaayyy-o.
paige: i never told you this, but i used to be one of the day-o guys. but then i chose to step down from the band because i felt it was taking me away from my family too much.
todd: crickets chirping because he has no sense of humor.
paige: so every time you come home and you see my smiling face, you better be grateful that i have my priorities in line and didn't value fame over you.
todd: how thoughtful. i am definitely grateful.
paige: here's my reasoning: i am only one day-o guy, but if i stay home and raise up lots of little day-o guys... well, then there will be even more day-o guys than just one. that's all i'm saying.
todd: still no sense of humor. also just wants to go to bed. also thinks paige is sleep drunk. and is correct, but still humorless.
and that's how we roll.
paige: i never told you this, but i used to be one of the day-o guys. but then i chose to step down from the band because i felt it was taking me away from my family too much.
todd: crickets chirping because he has no sense of humor.
paige: so every time you come home and you see my smiling face, you better be grateful that i have my priorities in line and didn't value fame over you.
todd: how thoughtful. i am definitely grateful.
paige: here's my reasoning: i am only one day-o guy, but if i stay home and raise up lots of little day-o guys... well, then there will be even more day-o guys than just one. that's all i'm saying.
todd: still no sense of humor. also just wants to go to bed. also thinks paige is sleep drunk. and is correct, but still humorless.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: marital intimacy
paige: kiss my teeth.
todd: okay, i'm ready. don't breathe so much. ehhhhhhhhhh... they're cold. i hate that.
and that's how we roll.
todd: okay, i'm ready. don't breathe so much. ehhhhhhhhhh... they're cold. i hate that.
and that's how we roll.
thwr: colorful.
paige: what color do you get when you mix red and yellow?
todd: orange. have you not read mouse paint?!?
and that's how we roll.
todd: orange. have you not read mouse paint?!?
and that's how we roll.
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