monday, monday, meme-ing down on monday.

oh dear, guys.  all i wanted to do today was post this crazy meme of crazy dawson's crazy cry-face:

because, seriously?! this still shot is the best thing that has ever happened to me.  but is it really so much to ask to just post an internet photo and move on with my life?  you'd think i was being perfectly reasonable to want to post just one meme, but apparently noooooooooo.  the internet had to go and be all hilarious again.  LIKE USUAL.  

so i present to you today's 'Best and Most Loved Memes That I Found After Only A Very Brief Search On the Internet' Runners-Up:

third runner-up:

second runner-up:

FIRST RUNNER-UP!

and there you have it, dawson.  a guaranteed way to turn that frown upside down.  (actually, it may take a bit more than these to turn that particular frown upside down, as it seems to be twisted into his face somehow.  but as for the REST of you, you now have no reason to be dawson-faced this fine monday morning.  you're welcome!)

what's up? (weekly.)

it's the end of the week, all, and you know what that means:  PHOTOS!

i have no idea what finneas is doing here, but he seems pretty confident about it, whatever it is.

my parents went to mexico on a missions trip in october, and brought the kids gifts this week.  penelope was looking rather dashing in her dress.

all of the kids have been happily occupied with atticus' birthday gifts, and there are plenty to go around.  the backhoe has stolen the place in atticus' heart that was once occupied by his Bobcat, which i didn't think was even possible.

penelope cut the cheese.  ha! fart jokes.

yesterday, todd took penelope on a daddy-daughter date to our local gourmet cupcake place.  (yes, we live in a world where that's a thing.)  she was beyond excited.

"here, daddy, it's bald now.  you can eat the rest."

penelope's verdict concerning the afternoon?

i bet your week wasn't as good as penelope's.

i'm hoping the fountain of youth is really just found in a pair of bedazzled jeans.

erg, you guys, i'm getting old.  i've felt it for a while now, just with the achier joints and the more brittle hair and the seemingly thyroid-related 'resistant weight loss.'  (thyroid disease is not a young-person problem, i've gathered.)  the other day i noticed that the skin under my chin is starting to sag.  i've started noticing that most 'young' people in the media are younger than i am, which is a shift.  but the clincher came a few nights ago, when a well-meaning teenager invited me to sing along to the new taylor swift song (which, hello, is irresistible) and i did... and then she was all, 'oh, you like the kids' music?'

and i was like, HOW OLD DO YOU THINK I AM?! I AM TWENTY-EIGHT!  I AM ONLY A COUPLE OF YEARS OLDER THAN TAYLOR HERSELF, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.  I AM NOT OLD AND I RESENT ANY IMPLICATIONS OTHERWISE.  I. AM. NOT. OLD.

and even as i shouted it, i knew it was only partway true, and also understood that there was no way on earth that a fourteen-year-old could understand that twenty-eight is not ancient.  i'm two lifetimes old to her.  i remember being twenty-one and becoming friends with a twenty-three-year-old and not even being able to imagine a day when i would be as old as she was.  (although, she's now thirty, obviously, so joke's on her.)

all that to say, at the ripe old age of twenty-eight, i'm not only feeling old, but i'm reaching the age where other people don't assume i'm young.  and that's sad to me.  so to try and combat that perception, i'm going to start trying my darnedest to seem younger:  i'm planning on buying myself some really low-rise Miss Me jeans in my high school size (because if it says it on the tag, it becomes true, and everyone else agrees that it must be your size) and some cap-sleeve tshirts that say stuff like "spoiled" and "whatever" on them.  i'm going to bleach my hair a really shocking shade of brass (except for the roots, obviously, which will remain dark, because dark roots give the illusion of volume, and volume gives the illusion of youth.)  i will always chew gum.  and i'll probably start tanning and smoking, because those things undoubtedly make you look younger for the first year or two.  and i'll definitely put my nose ring back in to round out the look.

this is the beginning of a new era for paige van voorst, so get ready, world.  i'm about to turn back the hands of time, and if i can't seem young, at least i can seem like an old person who's trying to seem young.  which is clearly the next best thing.  if anyone wants a ride in my new soft-top jeep, just page me.

video vednesday: at the end of the day, it's your health and attitude that makes us love you.

birthday party like it's 1999.

yeah, we did.

there was a cake, the theme of which was a repeat from a previous year, but which has proven to be a perennial favorite, so there's no complaining.

he looked thrilled to have to wait to open his presents.

it all worked out in the end, though, when he got his very own tool set.  another perennial gift, but this time it had real tools, and nails and screws, and real life wood from a tree on which to practice hammering and screwing.  among other gifts from people who know him well:  a dump truck, a lego set that can be built into three different construction vehicles, and a hot wheels track.

yepper, it was a right excellent party.

calls from the tub.

boop, boop, boop, just calling my bff.  

hang on, it's ringing.

haaayyyyyyy gurrrrrrl!

what's to the up to the wizzle.

hey, remember when everyone ended everything in 'izzle?'  that was a really confusing time, because if you tried to talk about, say, swizzle sticks, people always thought you were talking about sweet sticks, or swarmy sticks, or sweater sticks.  which would all only be, at best, related to what you're saying...  man, i'm glad those days are over.  now i can talk about swizzle sticks EVERYDAY, SON and never feel misunderstood and lonely.  i'm content in life now that 'izzle' is out.

but you know what's not out?  all the super fun crap we did over the last two weeks.

like... going with a friend and her kids to the victorian house museum one morning last week.  between the two of us, we were corralling seven kids, ages almost-six, five, four, three, two, one, and four months.  through a victorian house museum, which is exactly what it sounds like: a victorian house that has been turned into a museum of victorian living and things.  for instance, there was a china tea cup with a mustache-guard, sitting right at child-eye-level.  i was anticipating the worst.  but you know what? it was freaking awesome, and the kids were totally great.  would i go back again?  yes, yes i would.  but it would probably be in the summer, when coats and boots and christmas trees full of museum-y things wouldn't be involved.

like... stocking up on all the seasonal cheeses and wine-infused salamis at aldi, since it's christmas season and my favorite way to celebrate is to sit around in my bathrobe eating gourmet meats and cheeses.  (currently, i'm eating garlic and herb boursin, and chianti salami.  THANKS, ALDI!)

like... having our dear friend caleb come clean our carpets and couch because... four kids.

like... hosting thanksgiving.

like... having this girl 'help' me unload the groceries with such a cheerful countenance.  and a grapefruit.

and most importantly, like... this little man turning SIX YEARS OLD today!

those tinkerbell high heels are actually spiderman web-slingers.  obviously.

i can't even believe it.  my first child is out of the babyhood tunnel, age-wise.  as firstborn, and as atticus, he's been out of that tunnel for a while, helping me manage the work around the house, and watching out for the littler kids, and assisting me in eating all the bacon.  just like a grown man.  and he 'fwip fwips' with dead accuracy, just like a full-grown spidey.

oh, darlin'.  i can't believe you're so old.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LITTLE MAN!

video vednesday: hey man, can i borrow your jeep?

i feel as though, in fifteen years when i finally read these books and watch the movies (because, as we've all seen with harry potter, it takes me way too long to jump on the bandwagon), having seen this will make the actual movie a bit of a disappointment.

alert! alert!

the toddler is on the move!  i repeat, the toddler is on the move!

laurelai is a (walking) maniac, maniac on the floor.  and she's walking like she's never walked before.  seriously, she's getting really proficient and waddles and toddles around here all the livelong day.  (well, all the non-naptime moments of the livelong day.)

don't mind the bruise on her face.  casualty of her freshly chosen line of work.

now she can run with the wolves.  i mean, big kids.  i mean, wolves.

can you believe this child is fifteen months old?  she still looks like the tiniest of walking infants. 

just dying for the day when she's asked to join the cool kids' table... it's only a matter of time.

pages play to win. but really, mostly just for the fun of the game.

penelope's middle name is page.  i'm pretty sure people just assume i'm pretty narcissistic and just strong-armed todd into letting me name our first daughter after myself.  those people would be wrong.  sort of.

my mom's maiden name is page.  it's where she got the idea to name me paige in the first place.  which then means she's the narcissistic one.  so penelope is named after my side of the family, just like i was.

last friday, my sister, my mom and my grandpa (her dad, whose last name is obviously page) came up for thanksgiving.  which means there were four generations of page-namesakes in the same room.  did the whole place explode?!  sort of.  we played uno.

then atticus lost something competitive for the first time in his short life, and this happened:

at first, he was simply in disbelief.

things turned around later when he won:

todd's obvious handsomeness and joviality were pretty unshakable through the wins and losses of life uno.  that's precisely why we call him 'the rock.'  we also call him 'the beard,' for apparent reasons.

if this blog post was a game of uno, i should have yelled "UNO" before the last picture, since i'm now fresh out of photos to play.  i win!  first time ever!