We're all very excited for life to return to Kind of Normal. Or we're excited for s'mores; one or the other.
Yes, the library is back! I mean, kind of, but weirder than usual. They have a contactless curbside pickup option, in parking spaces that are too small to fit the Kraken. So does it really count that they're open if I can't actually go there? Such a tease. But I will not be thwarted. I actually went twice in the last week! The first time, I parked like a million miles away and used the 'walk up' option, though that seemed to disorient the employees for some undiscernible reason. The second time, I actually attempted to park in one of their designated spaces because it was raining, and then I promptly got boxed in by other cars, so I had to sit and wait until allllll the cars around me drove away before I could leave, and all the employees were again visibly confounded by my behavior.
I know you're jealous of my giant van life, but listen, I'm just an ordinary girl in an extraordinary van. I really can't take credit for my good fortune.
Look at that hottie of a van, basking in the warm autumn sun. That caption is meant to clarify that this is an old picture, in case you were confused.
In other news, I went to Kohls this week, hoping to find a few tshirts, because literally every. last. tshirt. that I own is a maternity shirt. Every stinking one. I wasn't looking for anything fancy - just something simple but flattering: not boxy, not clingy, not drab, not polyester. You know, like a basic, colored, cotton tshirt. I don't feel like I was asking for too much.
But as it turns out, I am not fit for the Kohls lifestyle. I am too matronly to shop the juniors department - first of all, I can't wear crop tops, so that rules out like 80% of anything on the rack right now. Second of all, I lived through the 90's once already, and I'm not enough of an idiot to do it again. (I'm not kidding, I saw an actual dress I actually already owned when I was thirteen.) Juniors just don't have that kind of life experience under their ugly belts yet, so they can be suckered into buying some truly heinous stuff.
But I am also too conceited to shop in the ladies' department. Because, hello. I'm still 29 and holding. And I will NOT wear swingy polyester tops with decorative neckline elastic. Which rules out about 80% of that department.
PLUS. Can I just take a moment to bemoan the state of our color palettes these days? Brace yourselves, because I'm about to get curmudgeonly and perhaps offensive. But I'm fine with my life choices, so here it goes: The only reason beige and dusty pink are considered neutrals is because they look equally bad on everyone. No one ever saw a lady in a skin-colored top and said, "That color is your color." But apparently if they throw enough mint-colored shirts into the primarily skin-toned mix on the sales floor, no one will notice that it looks like they're just selling other people's ill-fitting skin to new people.
PLUS. Apparently in Missouri, we only stock two sizes: Nephilim and Short Nephilim.
PLUS. The dressing rooms are closed, so I had to buy dozens and dozens and dozens of dollars worth of ugly shirts just to take them home and make doubly sure they were ugly before taking them back. Every last one looked terrible on me. (If you know of anywhere that sells bright, clear, deep colors in flattering cuts, I'm all ears. Which is maybe why it's so hard to find shirts that fit. Bah-dum-bum-cha.)
I clearly have not shopped for myself in a really, really, really long time. I don't know how to do it at all anymore, and if Kohls is any indicator of the shopping landscape, I'm in for an unshakeable depression in my near future. Maybe I'll just keep wearing my worn out, pit-stained maternity shirts until I die.
(Aren't you glad I'm back on Blogger? WHO HAS BEEN FILLING THE "GRIPE" HOLE IN YOUR LIFE IN MY ABSENCE?)
Let me move on to some more cheery news.
I've been reading L'Abri this week, which is like going home. I have read that book so many times, through so many different seasons of my life, and it speaks to me differently each time. I just love it and highly recommend you read it - and I have more book recommendations to make next week!
The kids all had dentist appointments yesterday. Because of all the COVID stuff, we waited in the car while each kiddo went in and had their turn in the office. It took about two hours, but honestly it was better than waiting in the waiting room for two hours, and I spent my time detailing the van dashboard. (Again, Van Life is so glam.) None of the kids had a single cavity (thanks, raw milk!) so we celebrated by getting McDonald's for lunch. You know, to deplete them nutritionally so that they get cavities in the future.
Luckily, we didn't have Juni in the car with us during our wait. With Todd working from home, I'm able to leave Juni home on our Amish trips and errands and appointments throughout the week, since she still takes a morning nap and doesn't disturb him while he's working. It makes things so much easier on her and us - long stretches in the carseat are difficult for her. Plus, she hasn't been feeling like herself this week - she's not eating well, not sleeping well, and is just generally under the weather. But go figure, she is still as calm and happy as ever, even though she's felt so crappy. There is no ruffling this girl.
On Monday, we made s'mores for our annual Mes'morial Day celebration. I'll tell you more about it next week, but for now let me just tell you that when you don't let Callista go inside every time she gets a little bit of sticky marshmallow on her hands, she full-on "Wolverine"s at you, bulging neck vein and all. If you know anything about her, you are not at all shocked by this.
And just to prove that she is multifaceted, here's a sweet photo of her on a different day this week, cuddling a ball the neighbors gave us. It's true love.
And that was our week, other than wrapping up our schoolwork. Today marks the last day of read-alouds for the school year, which means I'm on summer break as of 3 p.m.! The kids still have some math and reading to finish up over the next few weeks, but as they do that pretty independently, my teaching responsibilities for the year are basically over. I'll give you more of a rundown soon on how our year went!
Sayonara, Sammy. Have a great weekend!
