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paige 'spidey' v.v.

the other morning finneas was having a hard time going back to sleep at 4:00 a.m., and i was having a hard time staying awake during the same time period, so todd took him downstairs to let me get some sleep before it was time to nurse again.

he came back up around 7:00 and we switched places, with me taking finn and todd crawling in bed.  suddenly, he jumped up and started smacking at the bed.  turns out?  a moderately-sized black spider had been sharing sleeping quarters with yours truly.

which makes me think that one of two things will happen in the near future: 1) i will develop a large boil somewhere on my body that will pop open with a swarm of baby spiders in about nine months, or however long spider gestation is, or 2) i will soon start feeling an urge to dress in red spandex and swing, tarzan-like, from skyscraper to skyscraper on the deceptively delicate-looking web that i shoot from my wrists.

of the two, i think the latter possibility is the more appealing.  that way, if you're needing a ride to the top floor of a building but the elevator's broken, you will feel a strong desire to be my friend, self-motivated as the desire might be.  but then you'll be obligated to stay my friend even after i gracefully swoop you to where you need to be so that you don't look like you were just using me for my superhuman skills. 

and in that way, my radioactive spider blood will actually win me friends.  whom i promise not to upside-down-french, no matter how close of besties we become.  (sorry to mislead you if you thought this would go there.)

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