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some thoughts on pride and parenting: 1

atticus has been doing this thing lately where he likes to shriek at the top of his lungs. he's stopped doing it at home, but still loves doing it in public. we're handling it, so it has started to fade out, but it's definitely still a work in progress.

today i was eating lunch at hickory park with a friend, and atticus shrieked. the two older couples at the table next to us (who i THOUGHT had been staring because atticus is so stinkin' cute...nbd) started whispering and rolling their eyes, and one of the ladies was like, "he's done it at least five or six times now." later, when we got up to leave, i heard one of the men make some judgmental comment about how atticus wasn't wearing any shoes.

my first reaction was to get really angry on the inside. he is nine months old, people. he's not going to always sit still and quietly in public, regardless of how many times you say no. and seriously, why does it matter if he wears shoes?

then, i realized that i should be thankful that they were merely talking about my child and my parenting skills behind my back rather than to my face. seriously. because as a parent, it often seems like everyone thinks they would parent your kid better than you ever could, including people who don't even have children of their own. and i wish people would have to pay me in order to give me unsolicited advice about my family, because then maybe i could afford to put atticus in some very expensive shoes.

i also realized that i am also guilty of giving unsolicited advice. i think it's everyone's tendency to have opinions and even passions that work well in their own family, that they would like to share with others. there's nothing inherently wrong with that. it's just when we think that our way of doing things should be THE way of doing things, or that our opinions should be accepted as gospel truth, that we cross the line. (a quick disclaimer, though, there are things that are gospel truths. as in, stuff found in the gospel.)

so, here's an apology to anyone out there who has felt that i have pushed my opinions about child-rearing (or frugal living or green cleaning...) as a "you ought to" rather than a "if it works for you" pieces of advice.

2 comments :

Team Dewhurst said...

Just wait until he gets older and starts making comments on his own... Maddy saw a little boy and his dad, who was dressed very wanna be ganster, at the library and loudly annouced... "Mama, that boy has a pirate for a Daddy!!"... then you'll get the last laugh :-)

YAYA said...

Keep in mind, too, that with his hair trimmed, Atticus looks older than he is so "strangers" expect more from him. Don't get too frustrated!